诚恳的学习态度

伊浚:

想要赢得别人的尊重与信任，并不是需要很強的能力，而是很诚恳的态度。即使你经验不足，甚至能力不够，只要诚实以告，并表现积极的企图，认真的学习，还是可以争取到属于自己的机会。人生是漫长的，赢在起跑点，并不代表你会达到最后的胜利。反之，就算在起跑点的奔跑步伐緩慢，只要秉持信念，加上后天的努力，想必成功是指日可待的。祝事想心成。

The Story for You

The pencil maker took the pencil aside, just before putting him into the box.

“There are five things you need to know,” he told the pencil, “Before I send you out into the world. Always remember them and never forget and you will become the best pencil you can be.”

“One: You will be able to do many great things, but only if you allow yourself to be held in someone’s hand.”

“Two: You will experience a painful sharpening from time to time, but you’ll need it to become a better pencil.”

“Three: You will be able to correct any mistakes you might make.”

“Four: The most important part of you will always be what’s inside.”

“And Five: On every surface you are used on, you must leave your mark. No matter what the condition, you must continue to write.”

The pencil understood and promised to remember and went into the box with purpose in its heart.

Now replacing the place of the pencil with you, ChrisLee. Always remember them and never forget and you will become the best person you can be.

One: You will be able to do many great things, but only if you allow yourself to be held by good professor.

Two: You will experience a painful sharpening from time to time, by going through various problems in life, but you’ll need it to become a stronger person.

Three: You will be able to correct any mistakes you might make.

Four: The most important part of you will always be what’s on the inside.

And Five: On every surface you walk through, you must leave your mark. No matter what the situation, you must continue to do your duties.

Allow this story to encourage you to know that you are a special person and only you can fulfill the purpose to which you were born to accomplish.

Never allow yourself to get discouraged and think that your life is insignificant and can’t make a change.

Forgive for Good

To forgive may be divine, but no one ever said it was easy. When someone has deeply hurt you, such as your roommate at hostel or your classmate at RSMU, I believe it can be extremely difficult to let go of your grudge. But forgiveness is possible – and it can be surprisingly beneficial to your physical and mental health.

“People who forgive show less depression, anger and stress and more hopefulness”, says Frederic, Ph.D., author of Forgive for Good. “So it can help save on the wear and tear on our organs, reduce the wearing out of the immune system and allow people to peel more vital”.

So how do you start the healing? Try following these steps:

Clam Yourself

To defuse your anger, try a simple stress-management technique. “Take a couple of breaths and think of something that gives you pleasure: a beautiful scene in nature, someone you love”, Frederic says.

Don’t Wait For an Apology

“Many times the person who hurt you has no intention of apologizing”, Frederic says, “They may have wanted to hurt you or they just have different thinking way. So if you wait for people to apologize, you could be waiting an awfully long time”. Keep in mind that forgiveness does not necessarily mean reconciliation with the person who upset you or condoning of his or her action.

Take the Control Away From Your Offender

Mentally replaying your hurt gives power to the person who caused you pain. “Instead of focusing on your wounded feelings, learn to look for the love, beauty and kindness around you”, Frederic says.

Try To See Things from the Other Person’s Perspective

If you empathize with that person, you may realize that he or she was acting out of ignorance, fear – even love. To gain perspective, you may write a blog to yourself from your offender’s point of view.

Recognize the Benefits of Forgiveness

Research has shown that people who forgive report more energy, better appetite and better sleep patterns.

Don’t Forget to Forgive Yourself

“For some people, forgiving themselves is the biggest challenge”, Frederic says. “But it call rob you of your sell-confidence if you don’t do it”.

You Can Helps Yourself

“Heaven helps those who help themselves” is the results of vast human experience. The spirit of self-help is the root of all genuine growth in the individual.

Even the best institutions can’t give a man active help. Perhaps the most they can do is, leave to develop himself and improve his individual condition. But in all times men have been prone to believe that their happiness and well-being were to be secured by institutions rather than by their own conduct.

Daily experience shows that it is energetic individualism which produces the most powerful effects upon the life and action is constitute the best practical education. Schools, colleges and university, give the merest beginnings of knowledge. Far more influential is the life-education daily given in our homes, in the streets, behind counters, in laboratory, at the hostel and the market, in hospital and in the busy crowd.

This is that finishing instruction as members of society, “the education of the human race”, consisting in action, conduct, self-culture, self-control, -- all that tends to discipline a man truly and fit him for the proper performance of the duties and future life.

In fine, human character is molded by a thousand subtle influences; by example and precept; by life and literature; by friends and neighbors; by the world we live in as well as by the spirits of our forefathers, whose legacy of good words and deeds we inherit. But though these influences, men must necessarily be the active agents of their own well-being and well-doing; however they themselves must be their own best helpers.

谦逊的心情,努力学习

伊俊:

在你宿舍対面的大湖中的小魚，可能是小池中的大鱼。大鱼，小魚，大湖，小池，其实都是比较出来的。站在学习的观奌，我们宁愿自己永远是大湖中的小魚，怀着谦逊的心情努力学习，站在志气的观奌，我们不妨做小池中的大鱼，抱着宏远的志向积极表现自己。这么一来，不论在大湖或小池中，都可以快活地优游自在了。祝学业进步

The Success Personality

Is there a “success personality” – some winning combination of qualities that leads almost inevitably to achievement? If so, exactly what is that secret success formula and can anyone develop it?

At the Gallop Organization we recently focused in depth on success, probing the attitudes of 1500 prominent people selected at random from Who’s Who in America. Our research finds out a number of qualities that occur regularly among top achievers. Here is one of the most important, that is common sense.

Common sense is the most prevailing quality possessed by our respondents. Seventy-nine percent award themselves a top score in this quality. And 61 percent say that common sense was very important in contributing to their success.

To most, common sense means the ability to present sound, practical judgments on everyday affairs. To do this, one has to sweep aside extra ideas and get right to the core of what matters. A Texas oil and gas businessman puts it this way: “The key ability for success is simplifying. In conducting of meeting and dealing with industry, reducing a complex problem to the simplest term is highly important”.

Is common sense a quality a person is born with or can you do something to increase it? The oil man’s answer is that common sense can definitely be developed. He attributes his to learning how to debate in school. Another way to increase your store of common sense is to observe it in others, learning from their – and your own – mistakes.

Besides common sense, there are many other factors that influence success: knowing your field, self-reliance, intelligence, the ability to get things done, leadership, creativity, relationships with others and of course, luck. But common sense stands out. If you develop these qualities, you’ll succeed. And you might even find yourself listen in Who’s Who someday.

Communicating A Sense Of Personal Power

Communicating a sense of personal power comes from a belief that you can reach your goals in your own way. Powerful people empower others and encourage others to express themselves openly. You communicate a sense of personal power by developing these traits:

Authority

Authority is inner confidence – a trust in your skills and abilities. It comes from the inside, from an attitude of “I can do that.” “I deserve success”. This attitude radiates outward as you assert your rights, honestly ask for what you want and need, and develop a willingness to give to others and yourself.

Assertiveness

Assertive behavior is active, direct and honest. It communicates an impression of self-respect and respect for others. By being assertive, we view our wants, needs and rights as equal with those of others. An assertive person wins by influencing, listening and negotiating so that other people choose to cooperate willingly.

Accessibility
The powerful person is a master net worker. Good network increases your visibility and gives you a valuable circle of people from whom you can give and receive support and information. Imagine yourself as the hub of a wheel surrounded by spokes of contacts.

Image
You communicate power through your image. Do you project an image consistent with strong leadership? Stand tall and walk proudly, remembering that you have value as a person. When you meet others, make direct contact and keep your handshake firm and friendly. Clearly state who you are and what you do.

Communication Habits
Take a deep breath to project a firm voice. Avoid slang, and jargon, and vocal hesitations that can hinder effective communication. Use only the body movements and gestures necessary to make your point, no more. Learn how to write clearly and succinctly.

严于律己，宽以待人

伊浚:

我们往往很容易原谅自己。比如说，你自己常在冬天的早上起不了床，睡懒觉。每一次鬧鈡一响，就很痛苦，就起不来。你如果今天很晚睡，或者是錯过了规定的时间起床，你马上就原谅自己，你想明天继续努力，就没事了。但是对别人卻很难生起这样的心，这个剛好也是和我们傳统文化相反，老祖宗告诉我们要”严于律己，宽以待人”。”以恕己之心恕人，以律人之心律己”。以饶恕，宽恕自己的心去宽恕别人，以要求别人的那种心来求自己，我们就不会苦了。以简单的道理与人相处，日子就会很好过。若太复杂，就会惹来满心烦恼。祝万事如意。

Life will be good, if we can keep a simple mind in the dealing with people; otherwise, we will be inflicted by an abundance of afflictions.

Built Your Self-confidence

Confidence is a feeling – an inner fire and an outer radiance, a basic satisfaction with what one is plus a reaching out to become more. Confidence is not something a few people are born with and others are not, for it is an acquired characteristic.

Confidence is the personal possession of no one; the person who has it learns it – and goes on learning. The most gifted individual on earth has to construct confidence in his gifts from the basis of faith and experience, like anybody else. The tools will differ from one person to the next, but the essential task is the same. Confidence and pose are available to us all according to our abilities and needs – not somebody else’s – provided we utilize our gifts and expand them.

One of the most rewarding aspects of confidence is that it sits gracefully on every age and level of life – on children, men, women, and the famous, the obscure, rich, poor, artist, executive, teenager, the very old. And you can take it with you into old age. There is nothing more inspiring than an old person who maintains his good will, humor and faith in himself, in others, in the future. Conversely, the root cause of old people’s despair is a feeling of not being wanted, of nothing to contribute, no more to conquer and become.

Most people have more to work with than they realize. One noted physicist calls this unused excellencies and finding and releasing this potential in ourselves is one of the major challenges of modern life. The great danger is not that we shall overreach our capacities but that we shall undervalue and under-employ them, thus blighting our great possibilities.

The goal of life is not a problem less existence, which would be unbearably dull, but a way to handle problems, creatively. That word “problem” may sound a little prickly, but it only means a question put forth for solution and actually life consists of a series of problem – and – solutions, each different from the last.

Confidence is delight – delight in living, in being who you are, in what you do, in growing, in the endless and sometimes exasperating adventure of what it means to be human. The teacher who delights in teaching has no time for bogging down in a swamp of doubt that he or she is doing it “right”, and they are well aware that they can become a better teacher tomorrow, but only by doing their best today and enjoying today. So, too, the mother who delights in being a mother does not worry overmuch about whether she fits the rules. She is not the mother, after all, of something material but of a living child.

Rules can often be a guide to successful living, but they are not a substitute for living. Rules never quite keep up with reality, because rules come from experience, not the other way around. Life happens and it is infinitely inventive. It will always outrun and outmaneuver any attempt to bottle it up in a cut – and – dried system, for life is perpetual becoming. When life turns your wisest plans or best rules upside down, throw out the plans and bend with the circumstance. You will find powers you did not suspect and possibilities undreamed of.

Confidence is not always winning, not always victory. Indeed, it is that very quality in humanity which refuses to stay defeated. A kind of stubborn cheerfulness. Remember there are two things you can do with mistakes, you can run away and you can grow.

有所觉, 有所为

亲爱的姨姨：

公公是个性内向，平时沉默寡，不多说话的人，好像都少与人打招呼。在家里说话的永远都是婆婆，公公始终都是倾听者：左邻右舍每家都和婆婆很熟，但姨姨们都遗传了婆婆那健谈的性格，当姐妹们相聚在一起有诉不尽的情谊。

然而；常在锦福主动逗公公他老人家时,看见公公开心，放声地大笑。原来，他是个不快乐的父亲，却是个快乐的公公。

真的，老人家如婆婆若不快乐，做子女是不能“一无所觉”、“一无所为”的。老人家沉默、孤僻、不快乐，并不是他们的天生个性，而是子女与晚辈们，没有让她感到快乐啊!

赶快“有所觉’有所为” 。趁婆婆还健在的时候我们都要多主动地制造一些让她老人家快乐的事。祝福大家身体健康。

You Will Be Master Of Your Emotions

The tides advance; the tides recede. Winter goes and summer comes. Summer wanes and the cold increases. The sun rises; the sun sets. The moon is full; the moon is black. The birds arrive; the birds depart. Flowers bloom; flowers fade. Seeds are sown; harvests are reaped. All nature is a circle of moods and you are a part of nature and so, like the tides, your moods will rise; your moods will fall.

It is one of nature’s tricks, little understood, that each day you awaken with moods that have changed from yesterday. Yesterday’s joy will become today’s sadness; yet today’s sadness will grow into tomorrow’s joy. Inside your heart is a wheel, constantly turning from sadness to joy, from exultation to depression, from happiness to melancholy, yet you will remember that as today’s dead flower carries the seed of tomorrow’s bloom, so does today’s sadness carry the seed of tomorrow’s joy.

And how will you master these emotions so that each day will be productive? If your mood is right, the day will be a failure. Trees and plants depend on the weather to flourish but you make your own weather, yea you transport it with you.

And how will you master your emotions so that every day is a happy day and a productive one? You will learn this secret of the ages: “Weak are he who permits his thoughts to control his action; strong is he who forces his actions to control his thoughts.” Each day, when you awaken, you will follow this plan of battle before you are captured by the forces of sadness, self-pity and failure –

If you fell depressed you can sing.
If you feel sad you can laugh.
If you feel ill you can double your exercise.
If you feel fear you can plunge ahead.
If you feel inferior you can wear new garments.
If you feel uncertain you can raise your voice.
If you feel poverty you can think of wealth to come.
If you feel incompetent you can remember past success.
If you feel insignificant you can remember your goals.

Henceforth, you will know that only those with inferior ability can always be at their best and you are not inferior. There will be days when you must constantly struggle against forces which would tear you down. Those such as despair and sadness are simple to recognize but there are others which approach with a smile and the hand of friendship and they can also destroy you. Against them, you must never relinquish control –

If you become overconfident you can recall your failures.
If you overindulge you can think of past hungers.
If you feel complacency you can remember your competition.
If you enjoy moments of greatness you can remember moments of shame.
If you feel all-powerful you can try to top the wind.
If you attain great wealth you can remember one unfed mouth.
If you become overly proud you can remember a moment of weakness.
If you feel your skill is unmatched you can look at the stars.

Henceforth you can recognize and identify the mystery of moods in all mankind and in yourself. From this moment you prepared to control whatever personality awakes in yourself each day. You will master you moods through positive action and when you master your moods you will control your destiny. You will become master of yourself. You will become a great man.

如何能幫到你？

伊浚:

我们常思考如何能真正幫到远在俄罗斯的你？想要真正幫到你，我们就要体会什么是真正的爱。爱是用心去感受，绝对不是控制和佔有，爱是站在对方的角度去思考。爱是无私无我的为对方付出，甚至无求的付出，那才是真爱。如果我们现在对你的目的是要你考一个好成绩给我们，那是交换，那是逼你走一條路，那不是真爱。我们感受到，一切都得回到原点，从头学起什么是爱，才能真正幫到你。同时你自已也须学习如何幫你自已。幫你自已就要懂得爱自己也懂得爱她人。祝心中有爱才会人见人爱。

Passivity

Just passively letting your life happen may make it more difficult to accept yourself. Part of accepting yourself is engaging in activities that help you like yourself. Think back to those times when you weren’t concerned about your acceptability. What kinds of things were you doing? How were you spending your time? To accept and like yourself means that you approve of how you are living your life. If you aren’t accepting yourself, you probably don’t like the activities you’re engaged in. You are feeling dissatisfied. A way to increase your self-acceptance is to become more actively engaged in your life. Look for those activities and relationships that give you the most enjoyment – not necessarily the most enjoyment you could possibly have, but the most you can get from your choices at the moment. Try new things, perhaps things you have always wanted to try but didn’t because you felt you couldn’t do them. Try them with the attitude that you want to know what it would actually be like to do them. You may find that they are enjoyable and that you want to continue them. You may find that they are okay, but not worth continuing. You may find that you don’t like them at all and feel fine about crossing them off your list of things to do. Trying and getting real experience is a way of feeling better about yourself and gaining more confidence in your abilities.

The Comparison Trap

Judging yourself by what others have accomplished is a sure way to lower your self-acceptance. Have you noticed that you never compare yourself to people who seem to aspire to less than you do and that you always chose those people who are the top performers or the most popular as your yardstick for success? Are you as good as your friends, your roommate, your brother or sister, your parents or Joe Blow? And how about trying to be like “normal” people are? (And who or what determines what is “normal”?) Can you only be good if you’re better than someone else? When we use other people as our yardstick, we aren’t taking into consideration our own personal limitations or talents. For example, if someone seems to be more articulate than you, you can respond in one of two ways: You can become upset and depressed by telling yourself that you should be as articulate as that person or you can recognize and accept the fact that there are probably a lot of people out there who are more articulate than you at certain times and under certain circumstances and that is okay. It doesn’t mean a thing about you. Playing the comparison game is a dead end street. By doing that you are probably missing some other qualities by which you can judge your own worth, like your honesty, friendliness, caring nature, dedication and so forth. And really, people don’t value you for how much you are like someone else. They do value you for the ways you are being you.

Not Accepting That There Are Real Limits To Your Abilities

The idea that you should always be able to attain your goals as long as you work hard enough is another factor interfering with self-acceptance. You will reach many of your goals and should give yourself credit for having done so. Some of us have trouble seeing our successes because we focus so much on our failures and many times the failures come after a lot of hard work and personal suffering. It seems that all that hard work should pay off in our having reaching the goal we set out to achieve. It is hard to accept that a given goal may be out of our reach and that may be because of many factors, including the fact that we may not have the talent or skill needed to reach the goal. Of course there may be other factors in operation that make the achieving of that goal at that time impossible such as living environment concerns, Russian language problems, far away from family, extraneous stressors or any number of other factors acting alone or together. The real trick to self-acceptance is to see that the goal is unattainable, at least for now and shifting your focus to accomplishing what you can accomplish under the circumstances. That could include evaluating your original goal and deciding whether or not to continue with it. It also means giving yourself credit for what you have accomplished and what you have learned from your experiences.

Impossibly High Standards

Having standards that are impossibly high is a third way you can not accept yourself. It may not come as a surprise to you that most of us are more demanding of ourselves than we are of others. Somehow we can tolerate the fact that other people fail, that they aren’t always kind, that they’ve done things they aren’t proud of, but we have difficulty accepting those very human aspects of ourselves. The need to be perfect is another way to set yourself up for failure and enhance the feeling that you are not acceptable. We all make mistakes. Accepting less than perfection simply means recognizing the limitations inherent in being born a human being. Learn to value who you are rather than who you could become. To quote Linus, a sober and often worried character from a popular comic strip, “The world’s heaviest burden is a great potential”. Wouldn’t it be overwhelming if we always had to do what we imagine we could do? Nobody has the time and energy to do all of that. We must make choices about what we will pursue and do them the best we can under the circumstance (which aren’t always ideal, by the way).

Over-generalizing

Another thing that might cause you not to accept yourself is over-generalizing about something you’ve done that you don’t like. So, for example, if you fail a colloquium you might generalize and say, “I’m really a stupid person.” When you do this you are making a statement about all of you all of the time and not just about this one situation at this time was indeed poor and then go on to decide what you want to do about your poor grade, if anything. Getting stuck in over-generalizing discourages you from taking steps that might allow you to do better on the next exam and builds an expectation of future failure.

Moralistic Self-judgment

One way to really dislike yourself is to always judge yourself in a very moralistic way. People often spend a lot of time and energy labeling their behavior with moral adjectives such as “bad”, “hateful” and “mean”. When you apply these kinds of words to yourself you make liking yourself much more difficult. There is a more productive way of looking at yourself that will allow you to begin to like yourself more. Instead of evaluating yourself in this moralistic way, begin to ask questions like: “Did I do what I really wanted to do in this situation?” “How can I correct the misunderstanding that occurred?” In other words, you can start to view what you’ve done as productive or non-productive rather than as good or bad. If something is non-productive, you can focus on what you have learned form it and try another approach that might be more productive.

Learn To Accept Yourself

We are not born doubting ourselves. We learn to do it. In fact, we are usually taught to doubt ourselves. Often we are taught to do so by otherwise well-meaning people who are passing along their own doubts and uncertainties and who believe they are being protective and caring. What these people (usually parents and other significant adults) want are strong, capable and self-confident people, but they often inadvertently teach us thought processes that lead to something else. That’s the bad news. The good news is that we can understand some of these processes and learn new ways of coping that allow us to become more accepting of ourselves. Following are six behaviors you may have learned that can be unlearned and allow you to move toward greater self-acceptance. (will be continue)

考试顺利

伊浚:

每当你考试顺利的同时，我们在千里之外也感受到你的兴奋心情，分享你的喜悦。但是同様的，如果考试不及格，我们也会替你憂心。成功和失败並不代表好事和坏事，真正的好坏，在于我们如何去面対每次的成功，以及每次的失败。如果某项考试及格了，你当下傲慢，得意洋洋，得罪他人，这件成功的事情，己经是下一次失败的预兆，但是如果这次考试失败了，你也无须自責或归罪于人，而是因此奮发向上，总结经验，那在这次考试失败过程当中，已经在奠定下一次成功的基础了。祝考试顺利。

How Imagery, Positive Thinking and Suggestion Help Self-confidence

Imagery is useful in building self-confidence, but only if properly applied.

Imagery should be used to imagine achievement of a goal that is being worked towards in order to help you to believe that that goal is attainable.

It should only be used, however, where you are rationally aware that you have the raw ability to achieve a goal if you stretch yourself, but if psychological factors such as lack of emotional self-confidence are interfering with your ability to achieve. For many years psychologists have advocated use of imagery, positive thinking and suggestion without stressing that it should be based on a rational assessment of abilities. This can easily lead to overconfidence and serious failure.

How Goal Setting Helps Self-confidence

Goal setting is probably the most effective way of building self-confidence. By setting measurable goals, achieving them, setting new goals, achieving them and so on you prove your ability to yourself. You are able to prove to yourself that you are able to perform and achieve effectively. You can see and recognize and enjoy your achievement and feel real self-worth in that achievement.

Importantly, by knowing what you are able to achieve, you are not setting yourself up for surprise failure. You almost always have a reasonably accurate assessment of what your abilities really are.

Levels Of Confidence

The way in which you are self-confident is important: if you are under confident, then you will not take risks that need to be taken. If you are over-confidence, then you can end up not trying hard enough and losing.

Confidence should be based on observed reality. It should be based on the achievement of performance goals: you should be confident that you will perform up to your current abilities. Good self-confidence comes from a realistic expectation of success based on well practiced physical skills, a good knowledge of the sport, and respect for your own competence, adequate preparation and good physical condition. The success attained should be measured in terms of achievement of personal performance goals, not achievement goals such as winning.

Where you are under confident, you will commonly suffer from fear of failure, self-doubt, lack of concentration and negative thinking. Often you many find yourself blaming yourself for faults that lie elsewhere. These will damage your flow and disrupt your enjoyment of sport. Here you should use suggestion, visualization and effective goal-setting to improve your self-confidence and self-image.

Overconfidence is dangerous – it can lead you into situations which you do not have the ability to get out of. It can set you up for serious failure that can devastate the self-confidence you should have. Overconfidence is confidence that is not based on ability: it may be a result of misleading or pushy parents or coaches trying to help you without understanding your abilities, may be caused by vanity or ego, or may be caused by positive thinking or imagery which is not backed up by ability.

The Important of Self-confidence

Self-confidence is arguably one of the most important things you can have. Self-confidence reflects your assessment of your own self-worth. It will play a large part in determining your happiness through life.

Sport can be both enormously effective in improving self-worth and highly destructive in damaging it. Where sport is used creatively, with emphasis on enjoyment, effective goal setting and monitoring of achievement of goals, it can build self-confidence as targets are reached and improvement in performance is noted.

Where children are compelled to participate in a sport for which they have no aptitude, this can be immensely destructive to self-confidence as failure and lack of self-prepared to take moral responsibility for inflicting this damage.

Self-confidence allows you to take risks, as you have enough confidence in your own abilities to be sure that if things do go wrong, you can put things right.

苟日新，日日新

伊浚:

古人讲” 苟日新，日日新，又日新” 。你每天都可以提升自己，每天都是新的。因为” 新” 不在一个表面，而是時時反观自己的内心有没有提升？你的进退你自己知道，所以进退只在一念之间，不在于你的分数。你只有一个目标，就是今天的你，有没有比昨天的你进步？有，你就是进步。因为每个人的狀况会不一样，那我们跟别人比沒有任何的意义，每个人都是第一。你的进退就在你自己的心境上。不论你的成绩如何，在我们的心目中，你永远都是第一，因为你是我们的孩子。祝天天进步。

Don’t Fear Failure

Many career expert believe failure as the castor oil of success. The idea isn’t to fling yourself into certain disaster in order to be mystically rewarded with triumph. Rather, it’s a simple recognition that people who willingly risk failure and learn from loss have the best chance of succeeding at whatever they try.

You’ve had minor reverses in school or love, but you haven’t failed meaningfully. Never fear, everyone get chances. No one lives a failure life forever.

Failure is easy to recognize. It usually involves loss of money, self-esteem or status. At least, it is simply not getting what you want such as the Anatomy examination’s result you get recently.

Not that rational people should wish for calamity, but a stiff dose of misfortune is often a painfully effective tutor. It teaches you something about your strength and acquaints you with your limitations. That’s an important part of maturity.

People who profit from loss are the kind of foot soldiers business leaders seek. Continuous success builds arrogance and complacency. Unsuccessful people in stinctively avoid risks even when a smart gamble might pay off. You learn a great deal more from what doesn’t work than from what does. Failure is merely the cost of seeking new challenge.

If the thought of fouling up paralyzes you, here are several helpful suggestions:

1. Stop using the “Failure” word.
High achievers, rarely refer to “failure”, a loaded word suggesting a personal dead end. They prefer “glitch”, “bollix” or “course correction”.

2. Don’t take it personally.
When things go sour, don’t label yourself a loser. The language you use to describe yourself can become a powerful reality.

3. Be prepared.
Help insulate yourself by mapping a catastrophe plan. Opportunity is for who are be prepared. Keep in mind that the Chinese Ideogram for “crisis” consists of the characters for both “danger” and “opportunity”.

4. Learn to fail intelligently.
You must learn to reload and get ready to start again.

5. Never give up.
You can’t afford to get arrogant about success, so you must always trying to improve yourself by reading and study.

请把握”当下”

伊浚:

请把握”当下”，那就是把握自己现有的真实，好好努力学习和生活，这能使人无妄，无贪，更能令人提起积极自发的精神。这和打牌的道理是一样，不管手上握的是好牌，是坏牌，就是要把它打到淋漓尽致。你不能羡慕别人有好牌，不能抱怨手中的牌不好，要专心去发挥它。人生也是如此，不如意事十有八九，问题在于努力去运用的条件，才能创新的條件。祝事事顺利。

You Can Do It

Figure it out for yourself, my lad. You’ve got all that the great have had: two arms, two legs, two hands, two eyes and a brain to use if you’d be wise. With this equipment they all began, so start for the top and say “I can”.

Look them over the wise and the great. They take their food from a common plate. With similar knives and forks they use; with similar laces they tie their shoes. The world considers them brave and smart, but you know – you’ve got all they had, when they made their start.

You can triumph and come to skill; you can be great if you only will. You’re well equipped for the fight you choose you have arms and legs and brains to use. And people who have risen, great deeds to do started their lives with no more than you.

You are the handicap you must face. You are the one who must choose your place. You must say where you want to go and how much you’ll study the truth to know. God has equipped you for life; he lets you decide what you want to be.

The courage must come from the soul within; you must furnish the will to win. So figure it out for yourself, my lad; you were born with all the great have had; with your equipment they all began. Get hold of yourself and say “I can”.

圣彼得堡

伊俊:
从你带回来的明信片中，我发现俄罗斯的圣彼得堡和莫斯科市，有很多的教堂，外观设计如同马来西亚的回教堂; 教堂顶端有一个个矗立的园顶，然而园顶上却都有一个个十字架。俄罗斯的历史文化背景，造就了教堂融合了回教堂与基督教堂的设计特色，宗教和设计的园融和谐并存，让人感觉到平静和感动。这样的教堂设计仿佛无所不在。更震撼人心的是教堂内部壁画，从天花板到每一根柱子上，都完好的保存十七世纪留下来的画作，宗教和艺术伴隨历史嵌入现在和未来。从高尚的莫斯科圣彼得堡花园的博物馆和艺术馆，到莫斯科街头艺术，俄罗斯人的艺术创创意变化无穷，展现了多姿多采的精神创作。若有课馀时间，你别忘了到圣彼得堡去參观，解解在他乡求学的那种惆怅。祝2010年快乐。

Goals, Attitude & Belief to Yourself Make Success

I have always wondered about the secrets of successful people. What do they have that lifts them above the ordinary? How do they achieve the superhuman feats that elevate them above others? All of great men and women have found some common denominators among them all.

The first common denominator is a solid goal. Successful people know what they want and willing to do everything necessary to get it. They set big, hairy, audacious goals and believe in them so deeply that their lives naturally begin to gravitate toward those goals.

Second, successful people maintain a positive attitude. They believe in their goals and aspirations despite setbacks.

Third, successful people believe in themselves and a higher power. Success seems to favor those who have a healthy self-esteem.

I believe success is the progressive achievement of career, personal and family goals. A solid goal, a positive attitude and a strong belief would lead anybody who desires success along that path.

年年如意，幸福快乐

伊浚:
祝你年年如意，幸福快乐。什么是幸福？中国人的幸福是心与心的交流，那是时时感念别人对我们的关怀和爱護，以及时时自己去关爱周围的人。这幸福哪里是吃到一歺团园饭，欲望暂时的满足能夠比拟的？我们在这样的过程当中，愈来愈感受到幸福与我们的心境有关，与我们的思想观念有关。我们每天有没有去感受过，周围的人对我们点点滴滴的付出？我们每天在每个细节当中，有没有感受到幸福？在我们每天成长，每天读书工作，人生一步一步走向成年的过程当中，有没有累积我们自己的德行？我们回報了多少关心我们的人？。每天都有多少人在关怀我们，我们要懂得用心去感受。祝万事如意。
Wishing you and your love ones have a very happy, blessed Chinese New Year.

The Man And The Opportunity

Dear Yi Jun,

The lack of opportunity is ever the excuse of a weak, vacillating mind. Opportunities! Every life is full of them.

Every lesson in school, college or university is an opportunity. Every colloquium or examination is a chance in life. Every business transaction is an opportunity – an opportunity to be polite, an opportunity to be manly, an opportunity to be honest, an opportunity to make friends. Every proof of confidence in you is a great opportunity.

Every responsibility thrust upon your strength and your honor is priceless. Existence is the privilege of effort and when that privilege is met like a man, opportunities to succeed along the line of your aptitude will come faster than you can use them.

Don’t wait for your opportunity. Make it, make it as Napoleon made his in a hundred “impossible” situations. Make it, as all leaders of men, in war and in peace, have made their chances of success. Make it, as every man must, who would accomplish anything worth the effort. Gold opportunities are nothing to laziness, but industry makes the commonest chances golden.

勤打扫，常整理

伊浚:

请在宿舍里常常保持有条不紊的生活环境，这样除了可以让自已看起来神清气爽之外，也可以提高生活的品质及学习效率。很多人误以为美好的环境，来自精巧的裝潢，其实最簡单而有效的方法，就是勤打扫，常整理。这个道理不只能够应用在居家坏境，用在打理自已的服裝仪容，也一样有效，要常保持整齐瑞庄。所谓 ”敬人者，人恒敬之，爱人者，人恆恒爱之”。当你懂得尊重自已，别人才会尊重你。为什么在不笑的城市中的俄罗斯男女仿佛是从服装店橱窗跃出来的模特兒，长相那么精致？因为俄罗斯人都很重视他们的仪表。祝安康。

Be empathic, be considerate of others and they will be touched and think of us instead.

不笑的城市

伊浚:
俄罗斯的历史和文化艺术紧紧的拴在一起，前身是共产国家，解体后的俄罗斯人其实仍保持拘谨的态度，生活水准的高消费，导致一般平民仍面对生活和经济压力，因此笑容鲜少会出现在面容。那里的人说，在共产的拘谨，也让他们感觉到如果一个人总是在笑，会让人感觉那是” 不严肃，轻浮” 的人。甚至于”麥当劳”歺廳的招待员也不具笑容。因为他们认为对别人笑是一种羞辱，所以请切记在上课时要专心听课，不要交头接耳，更不要朝向讲师笑，从免引起不必要的误会，记得常保特严肃与端庄的学习态度。然而，令人感动的是在那不笑的城市，忠于艺术创作者即使穷生活，也不愿意穷艺术。祝学习快乐。

学好俄语

伊浚:

学好俄语，可以帮助你很顺利地进入异国的生活与文化，和当地的人打成一片並互相尊重。但俄语毕竞是沟通的工具而已，并不是深入对方灵魂唯一的方法。举个反例吧，很多同文又同种的人，在一起生活了几十年，也不见得能够真正了解对方。那么，打破思想藩篱的真正要诀是什么呢？其实，再简单不过了，只是一颗体贴的心。你必须要愿意抛弃自我的成见，设身处地为对方着想，才能亲近对方的灵魂。希望有待一日，你能把俄语学好，助你一臂之力求知。祝聖诞节快乐。

把愤怒化成力量

伊浚:
我们常都痛恨社会不公平，教授不合理，但是，当我们发现不公平时，不该只是愤怒，痛恨，而是应垓充实自己的力量，努力的把不公平变得公平。把愤怒化成力量。生气不但会引起胃肠中的血液流量减少，食欲变差，严重时会引起胃溃疡。同时也会阻碍免疫细胞的运作，降低身体抵抗力。如果你能改変你的信念，不再执着于那些“应该如何”，”不应该如何”的事，你的情绪很快就会有大大的改善，学习的更加愉快。所以，不要遇到不顺与歹不平，就一味的想要求别人改变，环境改变，有没有想过，当你的心念改变，你看到的人生風景，也会因为时转弯而完全不一样。祝考试顺利。

如何能真正幫到你?

伊浚:

我们常思考如何能真正幫到远在俄罗斯的你？想要真正幫到你，我们就要体会什么是真正的爱。爱是用心去感受，绝对不是控制和佔有，爱是站在对方的角度去思考。爱是无私无我的为对方付出，甚至无求的付出，那才是真爱。如果我们现在对你的目的是要你考一个好成绩给我们，那是交换，那是逼你走一條路，那不是真爱。我们感受到，一切都得回到原点，从头学起什么是爱，才能真正幫到你。同时你自已也须学习如何幫你自已。幫你自已就要懂得爱自己也懂得爱她人。祝心中有爱才会人见人爱。

祝你考试顺利

伊浚:

每当你考试顺利的同时，我们在千里之外也感受到你的兴奋心情，分享你的喜悦。但是同様的，如果考试不及格，我们也会替你憂心。成功和失败並不代表好事和坏事，真正的好坏，在于我们如何去面対每次的成功，以及每次的失败。如果某项考试及格了，你当下傲慢，得意洋洋，得罪他人，这件成功的事情，己经是下一次失败的预兆，但是如果这次考试失败了，你也无须自責或归罪于人，而是因此奮发向上，总结经验，那在这次考试失败过程当中，已经在奠定下一次成功的基础了。
祝考试顺利。

苦尽甘来

伊浚:

在俄罗斯升学虽苦，但苦尽甘来。它虽有一定的道理，但却不一定是每个人都愿意接受的人生哲学。辛苦，只不过是一种相对的标准。具备吃苦的能力及愿意吃苦的态度之后，人生的脚步就踏实多了。无论你接不接受，吃得苦中苦，方为人上人的说法，但可以确定的是，不愿忍受辛苦的人，即使侥幸获得成功，也无法品味其中的甘美。
祝苦中作乐，乐在其中。

Happy Brithday To You

Dear Yi Jun,

Today is your special 21st brithday at special place -- Moscow.
Today brings a chance
to look towards the future
new dreams, new successes.
To a bright new tomorrow
waiting for YOU!
Many Congratulations
on your
Special Day

卢布套利瘋，俄中行挡不住

俄罗斯中行甫于11月10日警告投资者不要利用卢布进行套利交易，但投资者充耳不闻，副隔天特续將卢布兑美元汇率推升到11个月高价，中行虽进场干预阻升卢布，但效果不彰。

受到油价走高，新兴市场资产诱人及俄罗斯经济复苏的吸引，外资不断买进卢布，9月以束来卢布兑美汇率己急升11%。卢布于2月跌低到1美元兑36.36卢布，11月11日则己攀升到28.63卢布，创下去年12月以来的高峰。

卢布兑美元和欧元的一篮子汇率则在11月10日盘中劲扬到35.12，突破35.15被视为中行的干预厎限。汇市交易员表示，俄罗斯中行可能进场买入大约7亿美元。

俄罗斯中行公开市场操作部门主管Sergei Shvetsov 奉劝投资者不要沉迷于套利交易，因为卢布的走势不会像危机前那样可预期。

分析师指出，俄罗斯中行目前的政策，包括卢布每升值5分就在汇市买进7亿夏美元，是无法阻拦坄投机客。

Trust Bank 分析师表示，投机客太好操作了，因为由价稳定，眼前又没有其他因素可打击卢布，所有资金都想进来。如杲果攻放手让卢布升值或许迓还可以教训投机客。他们会恢怀疑卢布已经升过了头，而吓跑一些资金。

俄罗斯中行第一副总裁Alexei Ulyukayev 表示，他们在11月己买进10亿美元，10月则是买进150亿美元。

俄罗斯的艺术

令人感动的是在这不笑的城市--莫斯科，忠于艺术创作者即使穷生活，也不愿意穷艺术。

从高尚的莫斯科圣彼得堡花园的博物馆和艺术馆，到莫斯科街头艺术，俄罗斯人变化无穷的艺术创作元素和创意，展现了多姿多采的精神创作。

在不笑的城市中，俄罗斯男女仿佛是从服装店橱窗跃出来的模特兒，长相非常精致。因为俄罗斯人很重视仪容; 出门的女孩们必定会化装，男孩则衣著端庄。

莫斯科人的生活

在俄罗斯，历史和文化艺术紧紧的拴在一起，前身是共产国家，解体后的俄罗斯人其实仍保持拘谨的态度，生活水准的高消费，导致一般平民仍面对生活和经济压力，因此笑容鲜少会出现在面容，甚至借酒消愁，人人手不离煙; 所以莫斯科人並不友善，但煙酒切最便宜，大约与马来西亚的免税区Pulau Langkawi同價格。

甚至于，这里的人说，在共产的拘谨，也让他们感觉到如果一个人总是在笑，会让人感觉那是” 不严肃，轻浮” 的人。

俄罗斯的莫斯科

从俄罗斯到另一个国度乌克兰，这样的教堂设计都无所不在。更震撼人心的是教堂内部壁画，从天花板到每一根柱子上，都完好的保存十七世纪留下来的画作，宗教和艺术伴隨历史嵌入现在和未来。

俄罗斯的圣彼得堡

俄罗斯的圣彼得堡和莫斯科，有很多的教堂，外观设计如同马来西亚的回教堂; 教堂顶端有一个个矗立的园顶，然而园顶上却都有一个个十字架。历史文化背景，造就了教堂融合了回教堂的设计特色，宗教和设计的园融和谐并存，让人感觉到说不出的平静和感动。

6. Passivity

Just passively letting your life happen may make it more difficult to accept yourself. Part of accepting yourself is engaging in activities that help you like yourself. Think back to those times when you weren’t concerned about your acceptability. What kinds of things were you doing? How were you spending your time? To accept and like yourself means that you approve of how you are living your life. If you aren’t accepting yourself, you probably don’t like the activities you’re engaged in. You are feeling dissatisfied. A way to increase your self-acceptance is to become more actively engaged in your life. Look for those activities and relationships that give you the most enjoyment – not necessarily the most enjoyment you could possibly have, but the most you can get from your choices at the moment. Try new things, perhaps things you have always wanted to try but didn’t because you felt you couldn’t do them. Try them with the attitude that you want to know what it would actually be like to do them. You may find that they are enjoyable and that you want to continue them. You may find that they are okay, but not worth continuing. You may find that you don’t like them at all and feel fine about crossing them off your list of things to do. Trying and getting real experience is a way of feeling better about yourself and gaining more confidence in your abilities.

5. The Comparison Trap

Judging yourself by what others have accomplished is a sure way to lower your self-acceptance. Have you noticed that you never compare yourself to people who seem to aspire to less than you do and that you always chose those people who are the top performers or the most popular as your yardstick for success? Are you as good as your friends, your roommate, your brother or sister, your parents or Joe Blow? And how about trying to be like “normal” people are? (And who or what determines what is “normal”?) Can you only be good if you’re better than someone else? When we use other people as our yardstick, we aren’t taking into consideration our own personal limitations or talents. For example, if someone seems to be more articulate than you, you can respond in one of two ways: You can become upset and depressed by telling yourself that you should be as articulate as that person or you can recognize and accept the fact that there are probably a lot of people out there who are more articulate than you at certain times and under certain circumstances and that is okay. It doesn’t mean a thing about you. Playing the comparison game is a dead end street. By doing that you are probably missing some other qualities by which you can judge your own worth, like your honesty, friendliness, caring nature, dedication and so forth. And really, people don’t value you for how much you are like someone else. They do value you for the ways you are being you.

4. Not Accepting That There Are Real Limits To Your Abilities

The idea that you should always be able to attain your goals as long as you work hard enough is another factor interfering with self-acceptance. You will reach many of your goals and should give yourself credit for having done so. Some of us have trouble seeing our successes because we focus so much on our failures and many times the failures come after a lot of hard work and personal suffering. It seems that all that hard work should pay off in our having reaching the goal we set out to achieve. It is hard to accept that a given goal may be out of our reach and that may be because of many factors, including the fact that we may not have the talent or skill needed to reach the goal. Of course there may be other factors in operation that make the achieving of that goal at that time impossible such as living environment concerns, Russian language problems, far away from family, extraneous stressors or any number of other factors acting alone or together. The real trick to self-acceptance is to see that the goal is unattainable, at least for now and shifting your focus to accomplishing what you can accomplish under the circumstances. That could include evaluating your original goal and deciding whether or not to continue with it. It also means giving yourself credit for what you have accomplished and what you have learned from your experiences.

3. Impossibly High Standards

Having standards that are impossibly high is a third way you can not accept yourself. It may not come as a surprise to you that most of us are more demanding of ourselves than we are of others. Somehow we can tolerate the fact that other people fail, that they aren’t always kind, that they’ve done things they aren’t proud of, but we have difficulty accepting those very human aspects of ourselves. The need to be perfect is another way to set yourself up for failure and enhance the feeling that you are not acceptable. We all make mistakes. Accepting less than perfection simply means recognizing the limitations inherent in being born a human being. Learn to value who you are rather than who you could become. To quote Linus, a sober and often worried character from a popular comic strip, “The world’s heaviest burden is a great potential”. Wouldn’t it be overwhelming if we always had to do what we imagine we could do? Nobody has the time and energy to do all of that. We must make choices about what we will pursue and do them the best we can under the circumstance (which aren’t always ideal, by the way).

2. Over-generalizing

Another thing that might cause you not to accept yourself is over-generalizing about something you’ve done that you don’t like. So, for example, if you fail a colloquium you might generalize and say, “I’m really a stupid person.” When you do this you are making a statement about all of you all of the time and not just about this one situation at this time was indeed poor and then go on to decide what you want to do about your poor grade, if anything. Getting stuck in over-generalizing discourages you from taking steps that might allow you to do better on the next exam and builds an expectation of future failure.