On Motes And Beams

It is curious that our own offenses should seem so much less heinous than the offenses of others. I suppose the reason is that we know all the circumstances that have occasioned them and so manage to excuse in ourselves what we cannot excuse in others. We turn our attention away from our own defects and when we are forced by untoward events to consider them, find it easy to condone them. For all I know we are right to do this; they are part of us and we must accept the good and bad in ourselves together.

But when we come to judge others, it is not by ourselves as we really are that we judge them, but by an image that we have formed of ourselves from which we have left out everything that offends our vanity or would discredit us in the eyes of the world. To take a trivial instance: how scornful we are when we catch someone out telling a lie; but who can say that he has never told even one, but a hundred?

There is not much to choose between men. They are all a hotchpotch of greatness and littleness, of virtue and vice, of nobility and baseness. Some have more strength of character or more opportunity and so in one direction or anther give their instincts freer play, but potentially they are the same. For my part, I do not think I am any better or any worse than most people, but I know that if I set down every action I my life and every thought that has crossed my mind, the world would consider me a monster of depravity. The knowledge that these reveries are common to all men should inspire one with tolerance to oneself as well as to others. It is well also if they enable us to look upon our fellows, even the most eminent and respectable, with humor and if they lead us to take ourselves not too seriously.

挂念着在远方的亲人

亲爱的母亲：

以前常听妈妈说“冬至大过年”，这是现今孩子都不懂的道理，那是口耳相传的古老讯息，是入冬之时预告农历年将至的节目，围在餐桌前一边闲话家常一边搓汤圆的动作，因为好玩，方略尽绵力。
现在离家远了，想起从前一幕幕闹哄哄的气氛，慕然触动心灵，才发现一颗颗汤圆，都蕴蓄了凝聚的力量，默默守护着每个屋檐下，维系人世间最弥是珍贵的感情。以人情作依归的传统节日，在年岁渐长后，成了心之所归。家人永远是家人，在伤害和包容的循环中，每年的冬至，仍然深深想念着在远方的亲人。祝：冬至快乐。

Successful Living

The first requirement of effective living is that we should have some sort of aim. Generally speaking, the difference between a successful person and an unsuccessful one is that the former knows what he wants and bends every effort towards securing that end, while the latter has only a vague idea of what it is he is trying to do with his life.

Such a person may have day dreams in plenty, may wish vaguely to be and do this, that, and the other; but that is a vastly different thing from having a definite objective in living – an all constraining aim towards which all interest and effort are directed.

Ask half a dozen people what their aim in life is. You will be amazed to discover how greatly most of them will be taken by surprise at the question and how they will have considerable difficulty in answering it with any certainty. More important is ask yourself with the same question.

What is your own dominant air? What do you want to do and to be? Unless you can answer this question at once in a few crisp sentences, you have not really started on the path of successful living.

The aim need not b anything very startling like making a fortune, or establishing a nationwide chain of business, or writing a best seller. It may be to widen your general culture by ordered and regular reading. It may be to become as efficient as you possibly can be in your own job, even though that job is a limited one. It may be to engage in some sort of voluntary social service. It may be to lay in your own home the basis of a truly happy family.

Any one of these aims could become an engrossing and satisfying pursuit, greatly enriching your own life and that of the community in which you live.

The human spirit is capable of almost inconceivable triumphs. We shall save ourselves some unnecessary frustration and heart break, however, if we choose an aim which is reasonably within the scope of the powers with which we have been endowed.

Once the aim is fixed, we must be willing to under go the necessary discipline and to attain the necessary knowledge and competency to fulfill it.

Somebody once said, “Genius is 10 percent inspiration and 90 percent perspiration.” Many people fail to achieve their object because, while enamoured of the aim, they are less enamoured of the effort required in its fulfillment. They think how lovely it would be to play like Paderewski, but they are not willing to practice long hours daily as he did. They dream of writing a best seller, or of having their name in lights, but imagine that such things can be achieved simply by thinking about them!

Whatever our aim, we need an insatiable thirst for knowledge about it. On the tombstone of a famous scholar are the words, “He died learning.” Learned as he was, he never imagined that he knew everything that was to be known.

But mere theoretical knowledge is not enough. The runner needs to know all about the science of starting, about poise, about breathing. But he learns to run by running. So, too, the artist will learn about perspective, anatomy, color blending and much besides, but he perfects his art by painting!

No aim can be achieved without determination. The difficulties that can be overcome, the problems that can be solved and the success that can be achieved by the exercise of the will, are simply astonishing. Here lies one of the truly dynamic powers of the human spirit.

But coupled with the will there must be an emotional drive of imagination, too. The interest and enthusiasm with which we give ourselves to the task in hand determine to a large extent the measure of success we shall achieve. We do best those things which we love doing.

活在当下

亲爱的母亲：

爸爸对子女有一份清静无染的爱，他不会有得失心，不会想收回，也不求任何回报；所以爸爸活在当下没有烦恼。今朝有酒今朝醉，天天有歌连夜唱；只是好花不常开，好景不常在。爸爸就这么不告而别。
因此，若想当下生活得安宁和平静，享有生活的喜悦，就要避免在心中产生高下，贵贱，得失之类的自我评价。这就叫做活在当下，活在真实没有虚妄之中，就能快乐无忧。
祝：活在当下，心无挂碍。

Your Success Is Your Choice

Dear Yi Jun,

All of us ought to be able to brace ourselves for the predictable challenges and setbacks that crop up everyday. If we expect that life won’t be perfect, we’ll be able to avoid that impulse to quit. But even if you are strong enough to persist the obstacle course of life and work, sometimes you will encounter an adverse event that will completely knock you on your back.

Whether it’s a financial loss, the loss of respect of your peers or loved ones or some other traumatic event in your life, these major setbacks leave you doubting yourself and wondering if things can ever change for the better again.

Adversity happens to all of us and it happens all the time. Some form of major adversity is either going to be there or it’s lying in wait just around the corner. To ignore adversity is to succumb to the ultimate self-delusion.

But you must recognize that history is full of examples of men and women who achieved greatness despite facing hurdles so steep that easily could have crashed their spirit and left them lying in the dust. Abraham Lincoln overcomes a difficult childhood, depression, the death of two sons and constant ridicule during the Civil War to become arguably greatest president ever. Helen Keller made an impact on the world despite being deaf, dumb and blind from an early age. Franklin Roosevelt had polio.

There are endless examples. These were people who not only looked adversity in the face but learned valuable lessons about overcoming difficult circumstances and were able to move ahead.

珍惜

亲爱的母亲：

如果墙上的时钟整天都一直在滴滴答答响，我们就不会觉知到它的存在，但是如果有一天突然停止，我们将会立刻觉知到。
我们和亲人的情况不也一样，当爸爸还在的时候，我们常视若无睹，我们不会想他，但是当他离开人间时，仍健在的我们常会想起他在世的点点滴滴，那个身影会一再浮现。我们知道“爸爸已经不在了。”但是当我们说他不在时，他已经存在我们心里了，所以别太忧伤，要多珍惜还在我们身旁的人。
祝：心开运就来

The "Competition" Meant

Once my mother told me a story. In Africa, when an antelope wakes up every morning, the first thing it thinks about is, “I must be able to run faster than the fastest lion or I will be killed.” At the same time, a lion wakes from his dream. The first thing the lion thinks about is, “I must be able to catch the slowest antelope or I will starve to death.” So, almost at the same time, the antelope and the lion get up and start running toward the rising sun.

This is life: full of chances and challenges. Whether you are an antelope or a lion, you must go ahead when the sun rises. For students, it is just the same. If we do not study hard, sooner or later, we will fall behind the other students. At first, I did not know what the word “exam” meant. Later, I knew an exam was a kind of competition. In competitions, there are always winners and losers. As I grew up, I got to know competition well. In one’s life, there must be competitions, so people can improve.

Each time I saw children playing games and heard their laughter, I wished I were that age again. However, I remembered my parents’ words: “You must work very hard in order to have a good future.” So I picked up my pen and began to study hard again.

I was still not sure what competition really meant. On day, I was taking part in a Malay-speaking competition. When I went to the stage, I saw other students looking at me kindly. I suddenly knew what competition was. It is not as cruel as my teacher and parents told me. In fact, competition is the opposite: it is kind and necessary.

I learned a lot from realizing this fact. Now I understand more about the world. Competition is important for us all.