教育下一代，用心做人

亲爱的姨姨：

妈妈时常都在提醒我说: “婆婆已活了这把年纪，你得空的时候千万记得常给她老人家打电话问候。”婆婆听觉不好，不如写信来得好，又有小姨亲口代问候来的亲切。谢谢小姨一路来讨婆婆的细心照顾，也常代我向婆婆问候请安。不因什么，只因您的妈妈就是我的婆婆。
最近爱写信，伊浚成了我电脑的文书助理。过程中也可以教育下一代，让他们了解我们这一代是如何把人做好，用心做人，做好本分的工作，如小姨现在做者是。
生命教育提醒我们活着要感恩，珍惜拥有，而很多时候这简单适时的提醒，真的可以免除一生的遗憾；这简单适时的表达，会让身边的人知道，您是多么的感恩他们对您所做的一切。因为生命有限所以我们更要格外珍惜，因为有缘，所以我们更应该把握。祝福大家身体健康。

Perseverance

Napoleon declared, “Victory belongs to the most persevering.” Upon careful study we find perseverance depends upon three things – purpose, will and enthusiasm. He who has a purpose is always concentrating his forces. By the will, the hope and the plan are prevented from evaporating into dreams. Enthusiasm keeps the interest up and makes the obstacles seem small.

Life is in a sense a battle. The man who thinks to get on by mere smartness and by idling meets failure at last. Perseverance is the master impulse of the firmest souls and holds the key to those treasure-houses of knowledge from which the world has drawn its wealth both of wisdom and of moral worth.

Great men never wait for opportunities; they make them. They seize upon what ever is at hand, work out their problem and master the situation. The greatest thing a man can do in this world is to make the most possible out of the stuff that has been given to him. This I success and there is no other.

One of the important lessons of life is to learn how to get victory out of defeat. It takes courage and stamina, when mortified by humiliating disaster, to seek in the ruins the elements of future conquest. Yet this measures the difference between those who succeed and those who fail. We cannot measure a man by his failures. We must know what use he makes of them. The man who has not fought his way upward and does not bear the scar of desperate conflict does not know the highest meaning of success.

不为什么，只因为你是我的孩子

亲爱的母亲：

念小学五年级的时候，因您的疏忽，忘了留下巴士费便去上班。当时家境贫穷，翻开整间家也搜不出两毛钱来塔巴士，由于有耻向邻居借钱，只好提早徒步从拉庆老家走到市区宽柔一小；路经义兴路婆婆家，顺道问候婆婆。婆婆见到我汗流浃背问起原因，我说着说着，婆婆眼泪掉了下来，泪中悲欣交集，悲中柔和了婆婆对孙女们纯纯的爱，是如实的爱，就像冰心最著名的那一句“不为什么，只因为你是我的孩子”的爱。婆婆慈祥的面容唤起了我对婆婆的思念。现今婆婆的记忆逐渐淡忘，请切记转告我对婆婆的问候与关怀，以免日后空遗憾。祝：万事顺利。

“The Present”

Dear Yi Jun,

Imagine life as a game in which you are juggling some five balls in the air. You name them: Work, Family, Health, Friends and Spirit. And you are keeping all of these in the air. You will soon understand that work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. But the other four balls – family, health, friends and spirit are made of glass. If you drop one of these, it will be irrevocably scuffed, marked, nicked, damaged or even shattered. They will never be the same. You must understand that and strive for balance in your life.

How?

Don’t undermine your worth by comparing yourself to others. It is because we are different that each of us is special.

Don’t set your goals by what other people deem important. Only you know what is best for you.

Don’t take for granted the things closest to your heart. Cling to them as you would to your life, for without them, life is meaningless.

Don’t let your life slip through your fingers by living in the past or for the future. By living your life one day at a time, you live all the days of your life.

Don’t give up when you still have something to give. Nothing is really over until the moment you stop trying.

Don’t be afraid to admit that you are less than perfect. It is this fragile thread that binds us each together.

Don’t be afraid to encounter risks. It is by taking chances that we learn how to be brave.

Don’t shut love out of your life by saying it’s impossible to find. The quickest way to receive love is to give; the fastest way to lose love is to hold it too tightly; and the best way to keep love is to give it wings.

Don’t run through life so fast that you forget not only where you’ve been, but also where you are going.

Don’t forget, a person’s greatest emotional need is to feel appreciated.

Don’t be afraid to learn. Knowledge is weightless, a treasure you can always carry easily.

Don’t use time or words carelessly. Neither can be retrieved.
Life is not a race, but a journey to be savored each step of the way.

Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery and today is a gift; that’s why we call it “The Present”.

婆婆的爱

亲爱的姨姨：

每逢佳节倍思亲，在这次的农历新年里，很高兴能向婆婆拜年。听婆婆讲述陈年往事，眼中不禁泛着泪光。仔细品尝潜伏心中的情绪，慢慢呵护自己的心灵。最终我明白了，原来我好思念眼前婆婆纯纯的爱，婆婆虽然没有受过什么教育，但是她讲的往事都隐藏着人生的道理。在婆婆的爱之中看不到批判，因为婆婆的爱就是纯然的爱，是如实的爱 。同时婆婆也懂得疼惜这样的缘分的心情。临别时，我不忘给婆婆一个挚诚的拥抱道别。我知道我很珍惜每一次与婆婆的相逢，每一面的相会，都传达着温情与关爱，都传达着接纳和包容。让每一面美好，让每一个当下不留白。祝福大家身体健康，生活愉快。

If I Rest, I Rust

The significant inscription found on an old key “If I rest, I rust” would be an excellent motto for those who are afflicted with the slightest taint of idleness. Even the industrious might adopt it with advantage to serve as are minder that, if one allows his faculties to rest, like the iron in the unused key, they will soon show signs of rust and ultimately cannot do the work required of them.

Those who would attain the heights reached and kept by great men must keep their faculties polished by constant use, so that they may unlock the doors of knowledge, the gates that guard the entrances to the professions, to science, medicine, art, literature, agriculture very department of human endeavor.

Industry keeps bright the key that opens the treasure of achievement. If Hugh Miler, after toiling all day in a quarry, had devoted his evenings to rest and recreation, he would never have become a famous geologist. The celebrated mathematician, Edmund Stone, would never have published a mathematical dictionary, never have found the key to science of mathematics, if he had given his spare moments to idleness. Had the little Scotch lad, Ferguson, allowed the busy brain to go to sleep on the hillside, instead of calculating the position of the stars by a string of beads, he would never have become a famous astronomer.

Labor vanquished all not inconstant, spasmodic or ill directed labor, but faithful, unremitting, daily effort toward a well directed purpose. Just as truly as eternal vigilance is the price of liberty, so is eternal industry the price of noble and enduring success.

用心生活,照顾婆婆

亲爱的姨姨：

从妈妈口中悉知您对婆婆照顾的无微不至。婆婆也曾经提起过她感到自豪拥有这么一位孝顺女儿。其实您已经学会了把人做好，简单来说，把人做好就是把自己的分内事做好，应该什么角色就扮演什么角色。如果大家都能做好本分的工作，这个世界会变成一个祥和的乐园。
若我们平日生活用心，没有白过日子，对人对事问心无愧，自然就能放下自己了。所以，怎样把人做好是很重要的，千万不要等到最后一口气的时候才来思考这些问题啊，因为做人也是需要以经验中学习从错误中成长的。祝：安康。

The Value Of Time

“Time is money, youth is capital”, says the proverb. This means that every moment well spent may put some money into our pockets. If our time is usefully employed, it will either turn out some useful and important piece of work which will fetch its price in the market, or it will add to our experience and increase our capacities so as to enable us to earn money when the proper opportunity comes. Let those who think nothing of wasting time remember this.

Our life is nothing more than our time. To kill time is therefore a form of suicide. We are shocked when we think of death and we spare no pains, no trouble, and no expense to preserve life. But we are too often indifferent to the loss of an hour or of a day, forgetting that our life is the sum total of the days and of the hours we live. A day or an hour wasted is therefore so much life forfeited. Our life is a brief span measuring some seventy or eighty years in all. But nearly one third of this has to be spent in sleep; some years have to be spent over our meals; some in making journeys on land and voyages by sea; some in merry making; some in watching over the sick-beds of our nearest and dearest relatives. Now if all these years were to be deducted from the term over which our life extends, we shall find about twenty or thirty years at our disposal for active work. Whoever remembers this can never willingly waste a single moment of his life.

All time is precious, but the time of our childhood and of our youth is more precious than any other portion of our existence. For those are the periods when alone we can acquire knowledge and develop our capacities. If we allow these morning hours of life to slip away, we shall never be able to recoup the loss. Just as money lain out at interest doubles and trebles itself in time, so the precious hours of childhood any youth, if properly used, will yield us incalculable advantage.

家有一老，如有一宝

亲爱的母亲：

新年佳节期间，很高兴有缘向婆婆及阿姨们拜年。婆婆身体虽然老了，但是讲起往日孙子们的故事时都充满朝气和活力。当晚她老人家向我谈起阿亮的故事，阿辉的故事，雪梨的故事，锦连的故事及……。虽然个个故事千篇一律，重复了又在重复；我还是很有耐心的听完每一个故事的情节。个个故事让我感受到婆婆对生命充满了无限的热诚，希望与喜悦。论年龄；婆婆已近古稀之年，但是当我听她说起威风神勇的往事，仿佛回到了当年的时候。婆婆虽近在眉睫，但感觉上切离我们越来越远了。我们要好好的去珍惜。
家有一老，如有一宝；婆婆是值得我们去关心，体贴和问候。毕竟终有一天，我们每个人都会老去，当手执拐杖，白发苍苍的时候，回顾自己的一生，若能有婆婆般的贤慧与尊严，也才不狂此生。最后让我们大家一起来为婆婆祝福。希望她老人家永远健康，幸福与快乐

Success

There are no secrets of success. Success is doing the things you know you should do. Success is not doing the things you know you should not do.

Success in not limited to any one area of your life. It encompasses all of the facets of your relationships: as parent, as wife or husband, as citizen, neighbor, worker and all of the others.

Success is not confined to any one part of your personality but is related to the development of all the parts: body, mind, heart and spirit. It is making the most of your total self.

Success is discovering your best talents, skills and abilities and applying them where they will make the most effective contribution to your fellow men.

Success is focusing the full power of all you are on what you have a burning desire to achieve.

Success is 99% mental attitude. It calls for love, joy, optimism, confidence, serenity, poise, faith, courage, cheerfulness, imagination, initiative, tolerance, honesty, humility, patience and enthusiasm.

Success is not arriving at the summit of a mountain as a final destination. It is a continuing upward spiral of progress. It is a perpetual growth.

Success is having the courage to meet failure without being defeated. It is refusing to let present loss interfere with your long rang goal.

Success is accepting the challenge of the difficult. In the inspiring words of Phillips Brooks, “Do not pray for tasks equal to your powers. Pray for powers equal to your tasks. Then the doing of your work shall be no miracle, but you shall be the miracle.”

踏实做人

亲爱的母亲：

说到忙，说到穷，比起爸爸当年的生活和经济情况，我们现在算得了什么，爸爸虽然穷一辈子，但是积极，有进取心，所以不会轻易被恶劣的环境打败，如果不是爸爸的严格要求，就没有今天的我们。要脱离穷忙，或者要学习如何在穷和忙中找到平衡，快乐，看来除了精打细算，最基本的动作就是不要急功近利，而是要踏实做人。人生最踏实的事，是今日此时多少力量，就尽快付出，去作利益人群造福社会的工作。
祝：有心就有福

On Motes And Beams

It is curious that our own offenses should seem so much less heinous than the offenses of others. I suppose the reason is that we know all the circumstances that have occasioned them and so manage to excuse in ourselves what we cannot excuse in others. We turn our attention away from our own defects and when we are forced by untoward events to consider them, find it easy to condone them. For all I know we are right to do this; they are part of us and we must accept the good and bad in ourselves together.

But when we come to judge others, it is not by ourselves as we really are that we judge them, but by an image that we have formed of ourselves from which we have left out everything that offends our vanity or would discredit us in the eyes of the world. To take a trivial instance: how scornful we are when we catch someone out telling a lie; but who can say that he has never told even one, but a hundred?

There is not much to choose between men. They are all a hotchpotch of greatness and littleness, of virtue and vice, of nobility and baseness. Some have more strength of character or more opportunity and so in one direction or anther give their instincts freer play, but potentially they are the same. For my part, I do not think I am any better or any worse than most people, but I know that if I set down every action I my life and every thought that has crossed my mind, the world would consider me a monster of depravity. The knowledge that these reveries are common to all men should inspire one with tolerance to oneself as well as to others. It is well also if they enable us to look upon our fellows, even the most eminent and respectable, with humor and if they lead us to take ourselves not too seriously.

挂念着在远方的亲人

亲爱的母亲：

以前常听妈妈说“冬至大过年”，这是现今孩子都不懂的道理，那是口耳相传的古老讯息，是入冬之时预告农历年将至的节目，围在餐桌前一边闲话家常一边搓汤圆的动作，因为好玩，方略尽绵力。
现在离家远了，想起从前一幕幕闹哄哄的气氛，慕然触动心灵，才发现一颗颗汤圆，都蕴蓄了凝聚的力量，默默守护着每个屋檐下，维系人世间最弥是珍贵的感情。以人情作依归的传统节日，在年岁渐长后，成了心之所归。家人永远是家人，在伤害和包容的循环中，每年的冬至，仍然深深想念着在远方的亲人。祝：冬至快乐。

Successful Living

The first requirement of effective living is that we should have some sort of aim. Generally speaking, the difference between a successful person and an unsuccessful one is that the former knows what he wants and bends every effort towards securing that end, while the latter has only a vague idea of what it is he is trying to do with his life.

Such a person may have day dreams in plenty, may wish vaguely to be and do this, that, and the other; but that is a vastly different thing from having a definite objective in living – an all constraining aim towards which all interest and effort are directed.

Ask half a dozen people what their aim in life is. You will be amazed to discover how greatly most of them will be taken by surprise at the question and how they will have considerable difficulty in answering it with any certainty. More important is ask yourself with the same question.

What is your own dominant air? What do you want to do and to be? Unless you can answer this question at once in a few crisp sentences, you have not really started on the path of successful living.

The aim need not b anything very startling like making a fortune, or establishing a nationwide chain of business, or writing a best seller. It may be to widen your general culture by ordered and regular reading. It may be to become as efficient as you possibly can be in your own job, even though that job is a limited one. It may be to engage in some sort of voluntary social service. It may be to lay in your own home the basis of a truly happy family.

Any one of these aims could become an engrossing and satisfying pursuit, greatly enriching your own life and that of the community in which you live.

The human spirit is capable of almost inconceivable triumphs. We shall save ourselves some unnecessary frustration and heart break, however, if we choose an aim which is reasonably within the scope of the powers with which we have been endowed.

Once the aim is fixed, we must be willing to under go the necessary discipline and to attain the necessary knowledge and competency to fulfill it.

Somebody once said, “Genius is 10 percent inspiration and 90 percent perspiration.” Many people fail to achieve their object because, while enamoured of the aim, they are less enamoured of the effort required in its fulfillment. They think how lovely it would be to play like Paderewski, but they are not willing to practice long hours daily as he did. They dream of writing a best seller, or of having their name in lights, but imagine that such things can be achieved simply by thinking about them!

Whatever our aim, we need an insatiable thirst for knowledge about it. On the tombstone of a famous scholar are the words, “He died learning.” Learned as he was, he never imagined that he knew everything that was to be known.

But mere theoretical knowledge is not enough. The runner needs to know all about the science of starting, about poise, about breathing. But he learns to run by running. So, too, the artist will learn about perspective, anatomy, color blending and much besides, but he perfects his art by painting!

No aim can be achieved without determination. The difficulties that can be overcome, the problems that can be solved and the success that can be achieved by the exercise of the will, are simply astonishing. Here lies one of the truly dynamic powers of the human spirit.

But coupled with the will there must be an emotional drive of imagination, too. The interest and enthusiasm with which we give ourselves to the task in hand determine to a large extent the measure of success we shall achieve. We do best those things which we love doing.

活在当下

亲爱的母亲：

爸爸对子女有一份清静无染的爱，他不会有得失心，不会想收回，也不求任何回报；所以爸爸活在当下没有烦恼。今朝有酒今朝醉，天天有歌连夜唱；只是好花不常开，好景不常在。爸爸就这么不告而别。
因此，若想当下生活得安宁和平静，享有生活的喜悦，就要避免在心中产生高下，贵贱，得失之类的自我评价。这就叫做活在当下，活在真实没有虚妄之中，就能快乐无忧。
祝：活在当下，心无挂碍。

Your Success Is Your Choice

Dear Yi Jun,

All of us ought to be able to brace ourselves for the predictable challenges and setbacks that crop up everyday. If we expect that life won’t be perfect, we’ll be able to avoid that impulse to quit. But even if you are strong enough to persist the obstacle course of life and work, sometimes you will encounter an adverse event that will completely knock you on your back.

Whether it’s a financial loss, the loss of respect of your peers or loved ones or some other traumatic event in your life, these major setbacks leave you doubting yourself and wondering if things can ever change for the better again.

Adversity happens to all of us and it happens all the time. Some form of major adversity is either going to be there or it’s lying in wait just around the corner. To ignore adversity is to succumb to the ultimate self-delusion.

But you must recognize that history is full of examples of men and women who achieved greatness despite facing hurdles so steep that easily could have crashed their spirit and left them lying in the dust. Abraham Lincoln overcomes a difficult childhood, depression, the death of two sons and constant ridicule during the Civil War to become arguably greatest president ever. Helen Keller made an impact on the world despite being deaf, dumb and blind from an early age. Franklin Roosevelt had polio.

There are endless examples. These were people who not only looked adversity in the face but learned valuable lessons about overcoming difficult circumstances and were able to move ahead.

珍惜

亲爱的母亲：

如果墙上的时钟整天都一直在滴滴答答响，我们就不会觉知到它的存在，但是如果有一天突然停止，我们将会立刻觉知到。
我们和亲人的情况不也一样，当爸爸还在的时候，我们常视若无睹，我们不会想他，但是当他离开人间时，仍健在的我们常会想起他在世的点点滴滴，那个身影会一再浮现。我们知道“爸爸已经不在了。”但是当我们说他不在时，他已经存在我们心里了，所以别太忧伤，要多珍惜还在我们身旁的人。
祝：心开运就来

The "Competition" Meant

Once my mother told me a story. In Africa, when an antelope wakes up every morning, the first thing it thinks about is, “I must be able to run faster than the fastest lion or I will be killed.” At the same time, a lion wakes from his dream. The first thing the lion thinks about is, “I must be able to catch the slowest antelope or I will starve to death.” So, almost at the same time, the antelope and the lion get up and start running toward the rising sun.

This is life: full of chances and challenges. Whether you are an antelope or a lion, you must go ahead when the sun rises. For students, it is just the same. If we do not study hard, sooner or later, we will fall behind the other students. At first, I did not know what the word “exam” meant. Later, I knew an exam was a kind of competition. In competitions, there are always winners and losers. As I grew up, I got to know competition well. In one’s life, there must be competitions, so people can improve.

Each time I saw children playing games and heard their laughter, I wished I were that age again. However, I remembered my parents’ words: “You must work very hard in order to have a good future.” So I picked up my pen and began to study hard again.

I was still not sure what competition really meant. On day, I was taking part in a Malay-speaking competition. When I went to the stage, I saw other students looking at me kindly. I suddenly knew what competition was. It is not as cruel as my teacher and parents told me. In fact, competition is the opposite: it is kind and necessary.

I learned a lot from realizing this fact. Now I understand more about the world. Competition is important for us all.

生命的路是要自己从荆棘中踏出来的

亲爱的母亲：

外婆已届暮年，日薄西山，由于女儿孙子众多，探望外婆的人也多。尤其是新年或生日期间，亲友来访络绎不绝，作为子孙的，都会奉献红包向她祝福添寿。可是她都会把红包奉还。也许金钱对她没那么重要，子孙满堂才是件乐事；故红包回敬子孙，祝福子孙事业昌盛进步。
记得念高中时，因家里经济拮据，我交不出八十六元的学期费。我犹如热锅上的蚂蚁，心急如焚。一向性子硬，不肯屈膝求人的我，只好迎着头皮，低颜向外婆求借。
俗语说：“渴望一滴如甘露，醉后添杯不如无。”当时虽然三几十元，却可以改变我的一生命运。离校后，穷有穷干，苦有苦干，儿孙自有儿孙福，凭自己的努力，突破困境，就如鲁迅所说：“生命的路是要自己从荆棘中踏出来的”。财富与幸福不是等待别人赐给的，而是要自己创造的。光明来自黑暗，幸福来自痛苦，从苦境中才能了解人生真谛。祝：吉祥幸福快乐

Ambition

It is not difficult to imagine a world short of ambition. It would probably be a kinder world: without demands, without abrasions, without disappointments. People would have time for reflection. Such work as they did would not be for themselves but for the collective. Competition would never enter in. Conflict would be eliminated, tension become a thing of the past. The stress of creation would be at an end. Art would no longer be troubling, but purely celebratory in its functions. The family would become superfluous as a social unit, with all its former power for bringing about neurosis drained away. Longevity would be increased, for fewer people would die of heart attack or stroke caused by tumultuous endeavor. Anxiety would be extinct. Time would stretch on and on, with ambition long departed from the human heart.

Ah, how unrelieved boring life would be!

There is a strong view that holds that success is a myth and ambition therefore a sham. Does this mean that success does not really exist? That achievement is at bottom empty? That the efforts of men and women are of no significance alongside the force of movements and events? Now not all success, obviously, is worth esteeming, or all ambition worth cultivating. Which are and which are not is something one soon enough learns on one’s own. But even the most cynical secretly admit that success exists; that achievement counts for a great deal and that the true myth is that the actions of men and women are useless. To believe otherwise is to take on a point of view that is likely to be deranging. It is, in its implications, to remove all motives for competence, interest in attainment and regard for posterity.

We do not choose to be born. We do not choose our historical epoch, the country of our birth or the immediate circumstances of our up bringing. We do not, most of us, choose to die; nor do we choose the time or conditions of our death. But within all this realm of choicelessness, we do choose how we shall live: courageously or in cowardice, honorably or dishonorably, with purpose or in drift. We decide what is important and what is trivial in life. We decide that what makes us significant is either what we do or what we refuse to do. But no matter how indifferent the universe may be to our choices and decisions, these choices and decisions are ours to make. We decide. We choose. And as we decide and choose, so are our lives formed. In the end, forming our own destiny is what ambition is about.

选择放下就能活在当下

锦莲：

新生命的诞生是旧有生命的传承与延续，从中你可感到一种无法言喻的神奇力量。西班牙就有句谚语说：“孩子是天上掉下的礼物，要好好珍惜，才能保存！
偏偏太有责任感的你放不下，抛不下手边一堆的工作。这似乎是成人世界的责任与义务，也可以说是无奈与感伤。因此你女儿与你只维持四个多月的因缘，也许她来这个世界想传达一些信息给你。请你好好的去体会与觉醒。再别把女儿的往生当成赌注，让她在天之灵能安息。祝：选择放下就能活在当下。

Which Are You?

A daughter complained to her father about her life and how things were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up. She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed as one problem was solved a new one arose.

Her father, a cook, took her to the kitchen. He filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to a boil. In one he placed carrots, in the second he placed eggs and in the last he placed ground coffee beans. He let them sit and boil, without saying a word.

The daughter sucked her teeth and impatiently waited, wondering what he was doing. In about twenty minutes he turned off the burners. He fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. He pulled the eggs out and placed them a bowl. Then he ladled the coffee out and placed it in a mug. Turning to her he asked, “Darling, what do you see?”

“Carrots, eggs and coffee,” she replied.

He brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. He then asked her to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg. Finally, he asked her to sip the coffee. She smiled, as she tasted its rich aroma.

“What does it mean, Dad?” She humbly asked.

He explained that each of them had faced the same adversity, boiling water, but each reacted differently. The carrot went in strong, hard and unrelenting. But after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak. The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior. But after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became hardened. The ground coffee beans were unique, however. After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water.

“Which are you?” he asked his daughter.

When adversity knocks on hour door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?

我亲爱的外婆

亲爱的母亲：

为父受戒百日已过，趁这次假期抽空探望外婆，她老人家比上回消瘦多，但健康依旧精神奕奕，只较健忘，她也自认记忆大不如前。
见到曾外孙们个个成长成人，他那份喜悦的心情我也能体会得出。
临别前，她从腰间掏出一些钱给曾孙们。每次我都被她的举动而愕然。她坚持一定要我们收下，我不敢违拗，恭敬不如从命，只好收下，但总是感到别扭，很不自在。
收下钱，不胜感慨。我正处盛年，一向自立更生，虽然一生劳劳役役，而今生活略可安裕，作为子孙本应尽报养之恩，为何还要外婆的钱？为了尊重她老人家的心意，只好接受她的钱，让她得到宽慰，但也令我凭空增添一份惆怅。 祝：健康快乐

Your Beliefs

Your beliefs are very powerful and have the power to create or to destroy your life. In most cases, whatever you believe is what you will become. If you believe that you are loser, that you never get a break in life that you can’t accomplish anything, these things will be your reality. Believe that you are unlimited, that you can do anything you commit to doing and when you do, your accomplishments will know no bounds.

You control your beliefs and that is how you ultimately control your life. This is a very important point. So how do you develop beliefs that will empower you?

Many of our beliefs come from our environment, the world we live in on a daily basis. If your environment is limiting your beliefs, then work very hard on changing it. If you are constantly around people who negative and limiting, find other people to hang out with. Get around positive, successful people.

Beliefs also come from past experience. That is why it is so important to experience success on a regular basis. Set small, achievable goals and then try your best to reach them. “I will finish this project by early afternoon.” “I will do my colloquium with sketch shown the next hour.” “I will exercise for 30 minutes for 5 km this evening.” When you start to experience success, then start to believe in success and that leads to more and bigger successes.

Beliefs come from knowledge. The more you learn the more things you will know to be possible. Always take advantage of opportunities to learn something new. It will bring new possibilities into your beliefs and your life.

Most importantly, you can develop new beliefs by setting and visualizing goals for your life. Define your goals clearly and with precision. Then, in your mind, see yourself achieving them in all of their sensory details. Mentally live the experience, see the sights, hear the sounds, smell the aroma, feel the feelings. Your nurtured beliefs will lead you to their reality.

新的出口，就在放下当中

锦莲：

你女儿不幸的消息确实令我们无不震惊与难过。一时间难以接受活人早已化为骨灰的事实，在百般悲伤和无奈的情况之下，我们盼望你能够早日走出忧伤和放下悲痛。
生有日，死也有时，无人有权利掌管生命，将生命留住；也无人有权利掌管死期。这生命中最后的争战；没有一人能幸免。人类为有安然学习，勇敢去面对和接纳早已不能改变的事实。因此，当你跌入生命的幽谷时，不妨不挣扎也不怨天，选择放下，全然地拥抱幽谷的一切，这时，你会发现原来新的出口，就在这放下当中。祝：幸福快乐。

The "SECRETS" To A Great Life

A great life doesn’t by accident. A great life is the result of allocating your time, energy, thoughts and hard work towards what you want your life to be. Stop setting yourself up for stress and failure and start setting up your life to support success and ease. A Great life is the result of using the 24 /7 you get in a creative and thoughtful way, instead of just what comes next. Customize these “SECRETS” to fit your own needs and style and start creating your own great life today!

1. S – simplify. A great life is the result of simplifying your life. People often misinterpret what simplify means. It’s not a way to remove work from your life. When you focus on simplifying your life, you free up energy and time for the work that you enjoy and the purpose for which you are here. In order to create a great life, you will have to make room for it in yours first.

2. E – Effort. A great life is the result of your best effort. Creating a great life requires that you make some adjustments. It may mean reevaluating how you spend your time or choosing to spend your money in a different way. It may mean looking for new ways to spend your energy that coincide with your particular definition of a great life. Life will reward your best effort.

3. C – Create Priorities. A great life is the result of creating priorities. It’s easy to spend your days just responding to the next thing that gets your attention, instead of intentionally using the time, energy and money you have in a way that’s important to you. Focus on removing the obstacles that get in the way of you making sure you are honoring your priorities.

4. R – Reserves. A great life is the result of having reserves – reserves of things, time, space, energy, money. With reserves, you acquire far more than you need not 6 months living expenses, but 5 years worth; not 15 minutes of free time, 1 day. Reserves are important because they reduce the fear of consequences and that allows you to make decisions based on what you really want instead of what the fear decides for you.

5. E – Eliminate distractions. A great life is the result of eliminating distractions. Up to 75% o your mental energy can be tied up in things that are draining and distracting you. Eliminating distractions can be a difficult concept to many people, since they haven’t really considered that there is another way to live. Look around at someone’s life you admire. What do they do that you would like to incorporate into your own life? Ask them how they did it. Find ways to free up your mental energy for things that are more important to you.’

6. T – Thoughts. A great life is the result of controlling your thoughts so that you accept and allow for the possibility that it actually can happen to you! Your belief in the outcome will directly dictate how successful you are. Motivated people have specific goals and look for ways to achieve them. Believing there is a solution to the same old problems you encounter year after year is vitally important to creating a life that you love.

7. S – Start. A great life is the result of starting. There’s the old saying everyone’s familiar with “a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.” In order to even move from the couch to the refrigerator, you have to start. There’s no better time to start than today. Don’t wait for a raise, or until the kids get older or the weather is better. Today, right now, is the right day to start to take a step in the direction of your heart’s desires. It’s what you do TODAY that will make a difference in your life tomorrow.

父亲把信心，毅力及勇气留给我们

亲爱的母亲：

祖父二战时忠烈爱国，牺牲国土，故爸爸自幼丧父，其母亲因生活困苦而改嫁。虽然如此爸爸也没因而生活有改善。因姑婆膝下无子，把父亲的抚养权争夺过来，切没得到姑婆的宽待。父亲这一辈子生活坎坷曲折，年青时还无端端被英殖民地政府捉去坐牢。自此以后爸爸学会了制鞋手艺。他以敬业乐业的精神做了这辈子的鞋匠养活我们一家人。虽然他没像林梧桐般拥有金山银山富可敌国的财富，但他把信心，毅力及勇气遗留给了我们这一代。这三者具备，则可让我们轻易立足于社会。爸爸是一支有泪的蜡烛，他点燃了我们的生命。 祝：有心就有福

True Nobility

In a clam sea every man is a pilot.

But all sunshine without shade, all pleasure without pain, is not life at all. Take the lot of the happiest – it is a tangled yarn. Bereavements and blessings, one following another, make us sad and blessed by turns. Even death itself makes life more loving. Men come closest to their true selves in the sober moments of life, under the shadows of sorrow and loss.

In the affairs of life or of business, it is not intellect that tells so much as character, not brains so much as heart, not genius so much as self-control, patience and discipline, regulated by judgment.

I have always believed that the man who has begun to live more seriously within begins to live more simply without. In an age of extravagance and waste, I wish I could show to the world how few the real wants of humanity are.

To regret one’s errors to the point of not repeating them is true repentance.

There is nothing noble in being superior to some other man. The true nobility is in being superior to your previous self.

敬老尊贤，血脉相承

亲爱的母亲：

父亲在世时，教会我们敬老尊贤。他最尊敬我们的亲爱外婆。每当外婆来访，他必须亲自放下工作出来迎接问好。外婆早已把父亲当儿子，可是父亲逝世切不告知婆婆老人家，何孝有之？哀哉！

虽然父亲未曾向我们提起过他敬爱的曾祖母，但他对曾祖母的恩惠念念不忘。因为曾祖母是他自幼从中国南下南洋的唯一至亲。当曾祖母往生后，父亲都一直保留着其遗照，但因种种不为人知的缘故，父亲勉强把曾祖母的遗照挂在工厂一处暗不见光又不显眼的板上，天天守望着其可怜的孙子在困苦中补鞋磨鞋求生活。一眼望去，曾祖母有着贤慧慈祥的音容，但有些人切望之生惧。有道是疑心生鬼。心中有疑，什么都挂碍。心中坦然，念念只有佛，就什么事都没有。

但愿有一天，曾祖母和父亲的遗照能堂堂正正挂在大厅堂保佑着李家子子孙孙血脉相承，延续家族的精神，出人头地，光荣耀祖。祝：选择放下，就能活在当下。

Be Happy

“The days that make us happy make us wise.” – John Masefield

This line by England’s Poet Laureate startled me. What did Masefield mean? Without thinking about it much, I had always assumed that the opposite was true. But his sober assurance was arresting. I could not forget it.

Finally, I seemed to grasp his meaning and realized that here was a profound observation. The wisdom that happiness makes possible lies in clear perception, not fogged by anxiety nor dimmed by despair and boredom, and without the blind spots caused by fear.

Active happiness not mere satisfaction or contentment – often comes suddenly, like an April shower or the unfolding of a bud. Then you discover what kind of wisdom has accompanied it. The grass is greener, bird songs are sweeter, and the shortcomings of your friends are more understandable and more forgivable. Happiness is like a pair of eyeglass correcting your spiritual vision.

Nor are the insights of happiness limited to what is near around you. Unhappy, with your thoughts turned in upon your emotional woes, your vision is cut short as though by a wall. Happy, the wall crumbles.

The long vista is there for the seeing. The grounds at your feet, the world about you – people, thoughts, emotions, and pressures – are now fitted into the larger scene. Every thing assumes a fairer proportion. And here is the beginning of wisdom.

珍惜活在“当下”

锦莲：

人生的旅途上总有来来去去的过客，今日有缘相聚一堂，要好好珍惜你身边的每一个人；也就是活在“当下”。

健康的心理生活，就是要面对真实，接纳自己和逆境，好好安顿自己。受挫的人能活在当下，就能安静下来，明天才有精神面对待处理的事务；伤痛的人活在当下，则能放下不幸的情绪，活出新希望；沉重的压抑终将逐渐流逝，蜕变之后的生命将更有潮气与自信，犹如蛹化彩蝶，翩然飞舞！祝：幸福快乐。

Forever Friendship

A friend walks in when the rest of the world walks out.
Sometimes in life, you find a special friend.
Someone who changes your life just by being part of it.
Someone who makes you laugh until you can’t stop.
Someone who makes you believe that there really is good in the world.
Someone who convinces you that there really is an unlocked door just waiting for you to open it.
This is Forever Friendship.
When you’re down and the world seems dark and empty;
Your forever friend lifts you up in spirits and makes that dark and empty world suddenly seem bright and full.
Your forever friend gets you through the hard times, the sad times and the confused times.
If you turn and walk away, your forever friend follows.
If you lose you way, your forever friend guides you and cheers you on.Your forever friend holds your hand and tells you that everything is going to be okay.
And if you find such a friend, you feel happy and complete;
Because you need not worry, you have a forever friend for life,
And forever has no end.

自造福田，自得福缘

亲爱的母亲：

爸爸在翁古慕申村很得人缘，别人喜欢邀他搓麻将，因为他不在意赢或输；别人喜欢请他去唱卡拉OK,因为他付钱比唱歌多；别人喜欢与他共进早餐，因为他舍得付账。他付出的多，计较得少，对朋友宽，对自己俭，懂得放下烦恼，所以活的很快了自在。爸爸能活在当下，活在真实没有虚妄之中，就能快乐无忧。我们无须疾妒，这是爸爸自造的福田，自然会得其福缘。
祝：自造福田，自得福缘。

Old Age

After return back from climbing the Mountain Kinabalu, I realize that I am not a young man anymore; I am growing old now. Psychologically there are two dangers to be guarded against in old age. One of these is undue absorption in the past. It does not do to live in memories, in regrets for the good old days, or in sadness about friends who are dead. One’s thoughts must be directed to the future and to things about which there is something to be done. This is not always easy; one’s emotions used to be more vivid than they are and one’s mind keener. If this is true it should be forgotten and if it is forgotten it will probably not be true.

The other thing to be avoided is clinging to youth in the hope of sucking vigor from its vitality. When your children are grown up they want to live their own lives and if you continue to be as interested in them as you were when they were young, you are likely to become a burden to them, unless they are unusually callous I do not mean that one should be without interest in them, but one’s interest should be contemplative and if possible, philanthropic, but not unduly emotional. Animals become indifferent to their young as soon as their young can look after themselves, but human beings, owing to the length of infancy, find this difficult.

I think that a successful old age is easiest for those who have strong impersonal interests involving appropriate activities. It is in this sphere that long experience is really fruitful and it is in this sphere that the wisdom born of experience can be exercise without being oppressive. It is no use telling grown-up children not to make mistakes, both because they will not believe you and because mistakes are an essential part of education. But if you are one of those who are incapable of impersonal interests, you may find that your life will be empty unless you concern yourself with your children and grandchildren. In that case you must realize that while you can still render them material services, such as making them an allowance or knitting those jumpers, you must not expect that they will enjoy your company.

Some old people are oppressed by the fear of death. In the young there is a justification for this feeling. Young men who have reason to fear that they will be killed in battle may justifiably feel biter in the thought that they have been cheated of the best things that life has to offer. But in an old man who has known human joys and sorrow and has achieved whatever work it was in him to do, the fear of death is somewhat abject and ignoble.

The best way to overcome it so at least it seems to me is to make your interests gradually wider ad more impersonal, until bit by bit the universal life. An individual human existence should be like a river small at first, narrowly contained within its banks and rushing passionately past rocks and over waterfalls. Gradually the river grows wider, the banks recede, the waters flow more quietly and in the end, without any visible break, they become merged in the sea and painlessly lose their individual being. The man, who in old age can see his life in this way, will not suffer from the fear of death, since the things he cares for will continue. And if, with the decay of vitality, weariness increases, the thought of rest will not be unwelcome. I should wish to die while still at work, knowing that others will carry on what I can no longer do and content in the thought that what was possible has been done.

待人退一步，爱人宽一寸

亲爱的母亲：


爸爸年纪大了，大脑相应迟钝，反应能力也都降了，眼睛耳朵也不灵了，原本钝熟的驾车技术，也变得让人不太放心了。爸爸老了，孩子们为何不知道？我们做子女的敏感度不高，没及时发现，给爸爸一个方便，让他好好安度晚年。爸爸的逝世深深刺痛了我的心。

人间世情的反复变化不定，人生之路曲折艰难充满坎坷。在人生之路走不通的地方，要知道退一步让人先行的道理；在走得过去的地方，也一定要给予人家三分的便利，这样才能逢凶化吉，一帆风顺。所谓待人退一步，爱人宽一寸，人人为我，我为人人，在人生道中就会活得很快乐。祝：幸福快乐

Our Courage

The courage of life like conquer Mountain Kinabalu is often a less dramatic spectacle than the courage of a final moment; but it is no less a magnificent mixture of triumph and tragedy. A man does what he must – in spite of personal consequences, in spite of obstacles and dangers and pressures – and that is the basis of all human morality.

To be courageous requires no exceptional qualifications, no magic formula, no special combination of time, place and circumstance. It is an opportunity that sooner or later is presented to us all. Politics merely furnishes one arena which imposes special tests of courage. In whatever arena of life one may meet challenge of courage, whatever may be the sacrifices he faces if he follows his conscience – the loss of his friends, his fortune, his contentment, even the esteem of his fellow men – such man must decide for himself the course he will follow. The stories of past courage can define that ingredient –they can teach, they can offer hope, they can provide inspiration. But they can’t supply courage itself. For this each man must look into his own soul.

量大福报大

亲爱的母亲：

每当放假回家，您都会向我倾诉爸爸的不是，但爸爸却不会因此而动怒，他听而不闻，视之无睹。始终无动于衷，因爸爸的量大，福报大。
我们常常最难看见的就是自己----平 日都是张着眼睛向外看，把别人称斤论两，把世事说长道短，殊不知自己在其中啊！如能跳脱开来，把自己也当成观看的对象，事理才真能看得清，分得开。
心如要保持常常快乐，就必须不要把人与人之间的事当成是非，有些人常常活在烦恼，因为别人一句无心的话，他却有意的接受。
祝：心开福就来

A Journey To Mountain Kinabalu

Have you ever wandered what it feels like to have the first sunlight through your eye? It is an amazing experience. Standing quietly on Low’s Peak with my friends and colleagues in the cold pre-dawn hours, we saw the clouds rolled slowly towards to us, and as our surroundings gradually became misty the dawn broke on the horizon and filled the sky with brilliant colour.

How are dare to scale the Low’s Peak of Mountain Kinabalu will know that was challenging. Trekking up the Mesilau trail was tough as we encountered 80 degree steps with no railings and tall rocks with no ropes to help us climb up, plus we had to jump on slippery rocks with shaky knees.

During the 8 hour walk to Laban Rata, our goal on the first phase of the climb, we braved freezing rain and winds. I felt so vulnerable but I kept plodding on, telling myself that every five steps I took were better than nothing at all.

About 2 km from Laban Rata, my body felt numb but the cold wind was merciless and I could feel sharp pains all over. By that time, it was sheer instinct that drove me and my compatriots forward in the dark. We had made arrangements to stay at Laban Rata Hut and I had to walk to get there after we having our dinner at Laban Rata Rest House about 4 pm. More discouragingly, there was a blackout and the temperature hovered around less than 9 Celsius. Despite being dressed full climbing gear, I struggled to stay warm for a few hours before the climb at 2 am.

After the briefing by the Head Guide – Gardis, 10 of us set set off on our journey to the peak at 2:30 am. When we reached the rocky cliffs after Sayat-Sayat check point, we were strictly reminded not to let go of the rope. The sheer cliff was nearly at a 70 degree angle and very slippery without wearing the mountain shoe name Adidas Malaysia. So physically, I was pushed to the limit.

But in the end it was all worth it when 6 or our group reached Low’s Peak and I mad it to South’s Peak; I felt whole range of emotions that brought pride, freedom, relief and joy. I have a camera to capture the moment before the Mountain Guide chase us down, and I stood quietly absorbing every second of God’s wonderful creation.

自造福田，自得福缘

亲爱的母亲：

爸爸的抽屉里收藏着各式各样的杂物，其中最为人感动的是数张献捐寺庙的收据以及一张捐助某某女士的医药单据。虽然爸爸受教育不多，但却懂得发挥其功能。他虽无腰藏万贯，但乐于助人。他无广夏千间，但能尽其所能，广交善缘，益心公益。人只要有心就有福，有愿就有力，自造福田，自得福缘。
爸爸懂得把握时机与因缘做好事，如果因缘消逝才想做就来不及了。有些人总是想要做好事，但都想等到自己有钱，或有机会时再去做，须知人生无常啊！只要有因缘，哪怕是一点一滴的力量，也要赶快去做。力量，因缘会合起来，就是无量公德。祝：功德无量。

On Going A Jounery To Mountain Kinabalu

School holiday is star tomorrow; I will going to conquer Mountain Kinabalu tomorrow until 18 of March 2009. Within this few days, I can’t continue to write my blog regularly. I will be continuing after return back from Sabah.

The pleasantest thing in the world is going a journey like this; but I prefer to go by myself. I can enjoy society in a class room; but out of doors, nature is company enough for me. I am then never less alone than when alone.

“The fields his study, nature was his book”.

I can’t see the wit of walking and talking at the same time. When I am the country I wish to vegetate like the country. I am not for criticizing hedge-rows and black cattle. I go out of town in order to forget the town and all that is in it. There are those who for this purpose go to mountaineering-places and carry the metropolis with them. I like more elbowroom and fewer encumbrances.

The soul of a journey is liberty, perfect liberty, to think, feel, feel, do, just as one pleases. We go a journey chiefly to be free of all impediments and of all inconveniences; to leave ourselves behind, much more to get rid of others. It is because I want a little breathing-space to muse on indifferent matters. That I absent myself from the town for a while, without feeling at a loss the moment I am left by myself.

求于人,即多苦

亲爱的母亲：

爸爸非圣人，圣人都会有过错，何况爸爸是凡夫俗子。他生性急躁，除非自己能力所办不到的事，要不然他决不会冒冒然求助他人。有求于他人即多苦，如一味的要求人，只会自己招来无穷的苦恼。所以爸爸那急躁的个性及不求人的态度造成了这次的交通事故。 一个缺口的杯子，如果换一个角度看它，它仍然是圆的。所以我们须从另一个角度来对待爸爸，爸爸永远还是我们亲爱的父亲。祝：太阳光大，父母恩大

Learn To Live In The Present Moment –- At Moscow

This is the magnified version of IKEA. Higher resolution as well, so that you can see the вход beneath, which means enter... the meaning of here is the Entrance. -- Yi Jun

Yi Jun write in his blog “Days In Moskva” on 8 March 2009 about “Auchan Session”. He feels that is always the hard time in Moscow when he is going to shopping. He spends around 2400 Rubles to buy stuff -- about RM240. I can imagine what a difficult time if he buy so much of thing, and he have to carry all the way back with public transport to his dome without any aid of others. The shopping there is not as nice as what we have in Malaysia, where we can drive the car into the basement parking lot which then later takes the escalator right into the shopping mall with trolley. Over Russia life more like suffering all the time. Thinking back in Malaysia, he realizes how lucky he was. But those were the nice old days.

To a large degree, the measure of our peace of mind is determined by how much we are able to live in the present moment. Irrespective of what happened yesterday or last year and what may not happen tomorrow, the present moment is where you are – always!

Without question, many of us have mastered the neurotic art of spending much of our lives worrying about a variety of things – all at once. We allow past problems and future concerns to dominate our present moments, so much so that we end up anxious, frustrated, depressed and hopeless. On the flip side, we also postpone our gratification, our stated priorities and our happiness, often convincing ourselves that “someday” will be better than today. Unfortunately, the same mental dynamics that tell us to look toward the future will only repeat themselves so that “someday” never actually arrives. John Lennon once said, “Life is what’s happening while we’re busy growing up and people we love are moving away and dying, our bodies are getting out of shape and our dreams are slipping away. In short, we miss out on life.

Many people live as if life were a dress rehearsal for some later date. It isn’t. In fact, no one has a guarantee that he or she will be here tomorrow. Now is the only time we have and the only time that we have any control over. When our attention is in the present moment, we push fear from our minds. Fear is the concern over events that might happen in the future – we won’t have enough money, our children will get into trouble, we will get old and die whatever.

To combat fear, the best strategy is to learn to bring your attention back to the present. Mark Twain said, “I have been through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.” I don’t think I can say it any better. Practice keeping your attention on the here and now. Your efforts will pay great dividends.

真正的好人从尽孝开始

亲爱的母亲：

父亲在痛苦中不告而别，他的离别让我深深感触到父亲的伟大。从回忆中我把他生平的点点滴滴用文字记录下来，然后恳求伊浚把它打成电脑放进部落格内；让子孙追思父亲生平的事迹。
父亲可算是尽了做爸爸的责任。虽然他自幼失其父；但夜半会为孩子扑被。虽然他受教育不深；但曾督导孩子读书写字。虽然他童年无温饱；但他工作半夜回家不忘打包夜宵。虽然他会打骂妻儿；但从未遗弃这个家庭。他养活了我们一家人；所以我们做子女的须懂得尽孝道，能孝才有善，真正的好人从尽孝开始。祝：安心有福。

Our New Neighbor

There was a funny family with two young kids’ just moves in opposite our house. This new neighbor lived in the house number 8. The husband and wife were same character as the old house owner who wouldn’t let everyone park a single car in front their house. They even chase away anyone with scold even we did not block their gate door. Sometime they also simply throw rubbish in front their own house. What a nasty neighbor. The wife even throws a pair of her slipper to our dog. Look at the picture as a prove. I feel it’s funny. For me, all of this just a small matter, I not bother so much!

It is not enough for us to say, “I love God”; but I also have to love my neighbor. St. John says that you are a liar if you say you love god and you don’t love your neighbor. How can you love God whom you do not see, if you do not love your neighbor whom you see, whom you touch, with whom you live? And so it is very important for us to realize that love, to be true, has to hurt. We must be willing to give whatever it does not to harm other people and in fact to do well to them. This requires that we be willing to give until it hurts. Otherwise, there is no true love in us and we bring injustice, not peace to those around us.

It hurts Jesus to love us. We have been created in his image for greater things, to love and to be loved. We must “put on Christ”, as Scripture tells us. And so we have been created to love as he loves us. Jesus makes himself the hungry one, the naked one, the homeless one, the unwanted one and he says, “You did it to me.” On the last day he will say to those on his right, “whatever you did to the least of these, you did to me,” and he will also say to those on his left, “whatever you neglected to do for the least of these, you neglected to do it for me.”

When he was dying on the Cross, Jesus said, “I thirst.” Jesus is thirsting for our love, and this is the thirst for everyone, poor and rich alike. We all thirst for the love of others that they go out of their way to avoid harming us and to do good to us. This is the meaning of true love, to give until it hurts.

时事无常

亲爱的母亲：

父亲已往生百日了，他教会了我们时事无常，要坦然地面对死亡，因为它是生命中的一部分；当懂得面对死亡了，活着就会更有力量。这种力量让我守丧期间，无畏无惧的睡在棺柩旁陪爸爸渡过最后的夜晚。

人间寿命因为短暂所以才更显得珍贵。难得来一趟人间，应问是否有为人生发挥其功能。如果每分每秒都好好做事，每天都活得像最后一天，任何时候就走得不遗憾！
祝：做好事，讲好话，存好心。

Be An Optimist

If you change your mind – from pessimsm to optimism – you can change your life.
– Claipe Safran

Do you see the glass as half-full rather than half empty? Do you keep your eye upon the doughnut, not upon the hole? Suddenly these clichés are scientific questions, as researchers scrutinize the power of positive thinking. Research is proving that optimism can help you to be happier, healthier and more successful. Pessimism leads, by contrast, to hopelessness, sickness and failure, and is linked to depression, loneliness and painful shyness. If we could teach people to think more positively, it would be like inoculating them against these mental ills.

Your habits count but the belief that you can succeed affects whether or not you will. In part, that’s because optimists and pessimists deal with the same challenges and disappointments in very different ways. When things go wrong the pessimist tends to blame himself. “I am not good at this.” “I always fail.” He would say. But the optimist looks for loopholes. Negative or positive, it was a self-fulfilling prophecy. If people feel hopeless they don’t bother to acquire the skills they need to succeed.

A sense of control is the litmus test for success. The optimist feels in control of his own life. If things are going badly, he acts quickly, looking for solutions, forming a new plan of action and reaching out for advice. The pessimist feels like fate’s plaything and moves slowly. He doesn’t seek advice, since he assumes nothing can be done. Many studies suggest that the pessimist’s felling of helplessness undermines the body’s natural defenses, the immune system. Research has found that the pessimist doesn’t take good care of himself. Feeling passive and unable to dodge life’s blows, he expects ill health and other misfortunes, no matter what he does. He munches on junk food, avoids exercise, ignores the doctor and has another drink.

Most people are a mix of optimism and pessimism, but are inclined in one direction or the other. It is a pattern of thinking learned at our mothers’ knees. It grows out of thousands of cautions or encouragements, negative statements or positive ones. Too many “don’t” and warnings of danger can make a child feel incompetent, fearful – and pessimistic. Perhaps this is the reason why Yi Jun was inclined in pessimism more that optimism like what he mentions about my education way for him in his blog “Days In Moskva” on 7 February 2009:

For if dad taught something, it is always to be obeyed. – Yi Jun

As conclusion, pessimism is a hard habit to break – but it can be done.

量大福就大

亲爱的母亲：

爸爸的人缘好心地也好，只是脾气不太好。认识他的人都这么说呀！因为他自幼父亡母散，无师长开导之故，殊不知要镜中人笑，必须自己先笑，这是种什么“因”得什么“果”。所以我们要懂得原谅爸爸的脾气。懂得原谅别人就是善待自己。生气是把别人的过错，拿来惩罚自己。多一次原谅别人。就多造一次福；把量放大福就大。

有智慧的人，会从对方的错误中找出自己的责任来。如果一直停滞在昨天，过去，就会产生杂念，有执著顾念之心。人一旦时时刻刻回忆往事，便会痛苦，怨恨，嗔怒，不甘心…。知道反省过去才是正确的人生，若只是随着日子消逝纸醉金迷，这叫做颠倒众生。祝：量大福就大。

Love To Your Life

However mean your life is, meet it and live it; do not shun it and call it hard names. It is not so bad as you are. It looks poorest when you richest. The fault finder will find faults even in paradise. Love your life, poor as it is. You may perhaps have some pleasant, thrilling, glorious hours, even in a poor – house. The setting sun is reflected from the windows of the alms – house as brightly as from the rich man’s abode; the snow melts before its door as early in the spring. I do not see but a quiet mind may live as contentedly there, and have as cheering thoughts, as in a palace. The town’s poor seem to me often to live the most independent lives of any. Maybe they are simply great enough to receive without misgiving. Most think that they are above being supported by the town; but it oftener happens that they are not above supporting themselves by dishonest means, which should be more disreputable. Cultivate poverty like a garden herb, like sage. Do not trouble yourself much to get new things, whether clothes or friends. Turn the old, return to them. Things do not change; we change. Sell your clothes and keep your thoughts.

踏踏实实做人

亲爱的母亲：

父亲在世时，待人处事心胸开阔，他能舍但不求回报；对子女也一样，他养活了一家七口，让我们受高等教育但他也从未要求子女们给他援助。他自己能做的事决不为难别人。所以别人对他不会有不平等的怨恨，逝世后留下的福泽，能够流传得长久，他能赢得后人无穷的怀念。

爸爸犹如点燃了的蜡烛照亮了我们。爸爸踏踏实实尽了人生的责任，他没虚度这一生。虽然他远离我们而去，但音容永远留在我们心里。祝：心想事成。

Life

Have you ever, at any one time, had the feeling that life is bad, real bad, and you wish you were in another situation? You find life make things difficult for you, work sucks, life sucks, and everything seems to go wrong …

Read the following story … it may change your views about life:

After a conversation with one of my friends, he told me despite taking two jobs, he brings back barely above 1K per month, he is happy as he is. I wonder how he can be as happy as he is considering he has to skimp his life with the low pay to support a pair of old parents, in-laws, a wife, two daughters and the many bill of a household.

He explained that it was through a incident that he saw in one country that happened a few years ago when he was really feeling low touring three after a major setback.

He said that right in front of his eyes, he saw a mother chop off her child’s right hand with a chopper. The helplessness in the mother’s eyes, the scream of pain from the innocent 4 year old child haunted him until today.

You may ask why did the mother do so; had the child been naughty, had the child’s hand been infected? No, it was done for two simple words – TO BEG! The desperate mother deliberately caused the child to be handicapped so that the the child could go out to the streets to beg.

Taken aback by the scene, he dropped a piece of bread he was eating halfway. And almost instantly, a flock of 5 or 6 children swamped towards this small piece of bread which was covered with sand, robbing bits from one another – the natural reaction of hunger.

Stricken by the happenings, he instructed his guide to drive him to the nearest bakery. He arrived at two bakeries and bought every single loaf of bread he found in the bakeries. The owner was dumfounded but willingly sold everything. He spent less that $100 to obtain about 400 loaves of bread and spent another $100 to get daily necessities.

Off he went in the truck full of bread into the streets. As he distributed the bread and necessities to he children (mostly handicapped) and a few adults, he received cheers and bows from these unfortunate. For the first time in his life he wondered how people can give up their dignity for a loaf of bread which cost less than $0.25.

He began to tell himself how fortunate he is. How fortunate he is to be able to have a complete body, have a job, have a family, have the chance to complain what food is nice and what isn’t nice, have the chance to be clothed, have the many things that these people in front of him are deprived of …

Now I begin to think and feel it, too! Was my life really that bad? Perhaps --- No, I should not feel bad at all … What about you? Maybe the next time you think you are, think about the child who lost one hand to beg on the streets. “Contentment is not the fulfillment of what you want; it is the realization of how much you already have.”

When the door of happiness closes, another opens, but often times we look so long at the closed door that we don’t see the one which has been opened for us. It’s true that we don’t know what we’ve got until we lost it, but it’s also true that we don’t know what we have been missing until it arrives.